It's Thursday night and that means another Fax From Babs.
To: Jacques Sheetrock
From: Barbra Streisand
Dear Jerque,
I would like to apologize for all the Americans who are badmouthing you and the rest of the noble French people. After all, we owe you a big debt of gratitude for helping us in the Revolutionary War. Who was that guy who came over and helped us? Was it the Marquis de Sade or Voltaire? Whoever it was, he was a big help.
I've always liked France and especially Paris. I'm from New York City and the people who live in Paris are so much like New Yorkers I feel right at home. By the way, what does manjay merde mean?
At least you are an elected, not selected, president. Our president was selected by the Supremes. I don't know why Diana Ross would have selected Bush over Al whats-his-name. And he is such a cowboy!
If only Al whats-his-name, our rightful president, was running the country, we wouldn't be in this quagmire in Iraq. I mean this war has already dragged on for three weeks. How long can our country put up with these massive casualties. I mean 40 people have already been lost. This is worse than Viet Nam. Under Al whats-his-name, we would have been able to use the diplomatic skills of Jimmy Carter. He's admired the world over and has a Noble Peace Prize.
I'm just hoping Bush comes to his senses and starts listening to you and the German guy and we can extricate ourselves from this unwinnable war in Irock. You French are just so much more civilized than most Americans, especially people from Texas.
Hope to see you next time I'm in France for the Canned Film Festival.
Amorez vous (Luv ya),
Babs