Bad Taste Office Humor Week continues:
Just damn! It looks like I might have to change my mind about Bush's Africa trip. Y'see, according to the Atlanta Urinal and Constipation, it's all about oooiiiillll!
President Bush will wind up his five-nation Africa trip with a weekend visit to Nigeria, the hub of a West African oil boom fueled by tens of billions of dollars in U.S. investment.
But like most other African countries, it's still a cesspool due to bad gummint.
With Americans consuming a quarter of the world's oil production, Bush has his eye on Africa's potential. Imports account for nearly half the 20 million barrels of oil Americans burn each day, and diversifying those supplies has become a national security priority.
Didja notice how the writer had to get in that we use a quarter of the world's oil? We also are the richest country on the planet. We create more and we invent more than any other country on the planet. We have the strongest economy and the most free society on the planet. We must be doing sumpin' right.
"If the U.S. intervention in Iraq does not bring peace in the Middle East, then the U.S. may have to look to other sources of oil," said Atlantan Vincent Farley, a former U.S. diplomat in Africa who has studied the issue. "And Africa is at the top of the list."
So maybe there is a good reason for Dubya to be in Africa. That's the second thing he's done right. The first thing was leaving the whiners of the Congressional Black Caucus home. Jesus H. Christ, those bastards call Bush a racist, a Nazi, and accuse him of starving the poor and all sorts of other mean and nasty things and then they're surprised that Bush doesn't wanna hang wit' dem? What a bunch of fucking idiots.
Many Africans say they see Bush's visit to their continent as a quest for oil disguised under a veneer of caring. Foreigners have coveted African resources --- minerals, gemstones and timber as well as oil --- for more than a century. Improved technology for finding oil in the deep waters off the West African coast and the U.S. drive to decrease its reliance on crude from the volatile Persian Gulf have fueled the recent boom in U.S. investment in the region.
And with all those natural resources, Africa is still mired in poverty. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's all the fault of us white folks and our colonialism. So what's Zimbabwe's excuse? Here was a wealthy country that was handed over to the majority black population and it is now a basket case. Where's the white colonialism there? Mugabe's thugs killed the white farmers and took their lands and now a country that used to export food has to import food. Isn't it funny that when whites kill blacks it's racism and when blacks kill whites it's OK?
The White House has emphasized that Bush --- who arrives in Nigeria late today for a Saturday meeting with President Olusegun Obasanjo --- came to Africa largely because he is committed to helping the continent battle AIDS and to improving its standard of living through increased trade.
And having another oil source wouldn't hurt. And before any of you fucking liberals bitch about oil, turn off your lights, unplug all your appliances, quit driving your cars, and then you can bitch about it being 'all about oil'. You hypocritical bastards make me sick.
In a demonstration in the South African administrative capital, Pretoria, earlier this week, protesters claimed Bush came to Africa with "big juicy carrots" to get American hands on the continent's oil.
Which we will pay for and that would be bad for the economy of Africa because ... ?
The Johannesburg daily, the Mail & Guardian, agreed. In an editorial, the newspaper said Bush's trip "must be seen for what it is --- hard-eyed self-service posing as a mercy mission. . . . Bush's primary concerns, as they were before the invasion of Iraq, are domestic security, the advancement of corporate America and the securing of strategic assets, mainly oil."
Those would be my concerns too. Bush is doing what a president should be doing. He's no Jimmy Carter or Bill Clinton and for that I am glad. This president actually cares for national security.
Africa already supplies between 15 percent and 18 percent of the oil the United States imports, said Gus Selassie, a senior analyst with the World Market Research Center in London. That proportion is projected to increase to 25 percent by 2015, he said.
Think of all that money pouring into Africa and what will the Africans do with it?
So far, ordinary Africans have benefited little from their countries' natural resources. In Angola, for example, while the population remains impoverished, at least $1 billion a year in oil revenue disappears, apparently siphoned off by government officials, said Simon Taylor, a director of Global Witness, a London-based group that advocates that oil revenues around the world be made public.
Yeah. Let's have a big ol' dose of worldwide socialism.
When Nigerian dictator Sani Abacha died in 1998 after five years in power, he and his family were discovered to have stashed billions of dollars in personal bank accounts. Obasanjo has led an effort to recover some of that money for the Nigerian treasury.
Good luck.
Africa's most populous nation, Nigeria, is also the continent's oil giant, producing more than 2 million barrels of crude a day --- about a third of Africa's total output. A barrel contains 42 gallons.
Nigeria currently exports 742,000 barrels a day to the United States, 8 percent of the total U.S. crude oil imports of 9.2 million barrels a day. Angola accounts for 5.4 percent of U.S. oil imports.
Yet the average Nigerian lives in poverty, which is probably our fault.
Critics accuse the United States, in its thirst for oil, of easing its demands for democracy and good governance in the oil-rich countries. In Equatorial Guinea, for example, the long-time president, retired Brig. Gen. Teodoro Mbasogo, was re-elected last December with 97.1 percent of the vote in balloting that observers said was marred by fraud.
These are undoubtably the same critics who said Saddam Hussein's election was OK and say that Cuba is a workers' paradise. Maybe if we accused Mbasogo of having WMD's and supporting terrorism, the critics would think he was a good guy. So, are we supposed to invade Nigeria and effect a regime change? Who determines which countries we should invade?
OK here comes an Africa rant.
"White folks was in the caves while we was building empires. We taught philosophy and astrology and mathematics before Socrates and them Greek homos ever got around to it." - Al Sharpton
OK Al, you racist, homophobic bastard, what the fuck happened? Look at Africa now. 2000 years ago Egypt was the richest country in the world. Now we have to pay 'em $2 billion a year to keep 'em from fighting with Israel. And to believe some black people, the ancient Egyptians were black and they had Hebrew (Jews to you Al) slaves. Uh oh! Since y'all believe that blacks are owed reparations for building the United States, I really think the Jews should get some reparations for building Egypt. I think you, Jesse and Johnny Cochran oughtta start coughing up some money for the Jews. They were slaves before you were.
And those philosophers, astrologers, and mathematicians are now eating pygmies in the Congo. Sub-Saharan Africa is a basket case and no amount of money can fix it until the people get their act together. Mugabe needs to be thrown out of office and his socialist policies stopped. Mark my words, in ten years South Africa will be in the same shape Zimbabwe is now. And lest you think I'm a racist for saying that it's the failure of black rule, you'd be wrong. The ANC is a socialist organization. It will be the failure of socialist rule. We're also gonna find that the ANC is a racist organization as it will begin doing the same thing to South Africa's white population that Zimbabwe is currently doing to its white population.
There is already talk of majority black ownership of South Africa's diamond mines. Hmmmm. Sounds like the majority black ownership of the farms in Zimbabwe. And guess who the owners of the diamond mines will be? It won't be the average South African. It will be a friend of someone in the thugocracy that will be the South African gummint. If you are white and live in South Africa, ya better get out while the gettin' is good.
The best thing that we can do in Africa is to invest money and develop Africa's resources. We need to encourage free societies and orderly self gummint. This is hard to do when you have black 'leaders' in the United States supporting thugs. Hey, Congressional Black Caucus, how come you're not castigating Mugabe? Oh yeah, he's killing white folks so that's OK. But he's also killing half of his population. And them folks is black. Rather than calling Bush a racist, you folks should be screaming about the repression and misrule done by black tyrants and despots.
Africa, with its natural resources and the home of teachers of 'philosophy and astrology and mathematics' per the Reverend Al, should have some of the wealthiest countries on the planet. Instead it has the poorest. We can only point the way. The Africans need to do the work themselves. Can they do it?
I doubt it.
Especially with the rest of the world condoning thugs like Mugabe.