Cute Cat Picture for Pumpman Week continues.
Busted! I just know that's the Pumpman sitting on the john. And there's his secret friend. And guess what? This post is straight from the toilet.
The other day Pumpman wrote this post about Linkers (like Instapundit), Thinkers (like Den Beste), and Stinkers. The first Stinker was my companion grouch, Kim du Toit. He listed me second! Thanks, Rob. Fuck the wine collection! We'd go right to Italian white lightning: grappa! The world might not be a better place, but we sure wouldn't give a fuck.
John Hawkins (Hey John! Why don't you ever give me a plug as an under appreciated blog? Some of my Faxes from Babs are amusing. I gotta earn my hits the hard way.) does a lot of Blogger Symposiums where he has chats with other bloggers. I think he's really missing out on having one with the three Stinkers: Pumpman, Kim du Toit, and myself. So, let's imagine how it would go.
Hawkins: First off, let me thank you guys for showing up.
Kim: Can we make this quick? I gotta get to the range.
Pumpman: I must have the biggest balls in the world right now.
GOC: Hey Pumpman! They ain't as big as this guy's!
Hawkins: We're not here to talk about balls.
Pumpman: Why not?
GOC: I've just opened a nice bottle of Gigondas. Wow! What a bouquet!
Hawkins: We're not here to talk about wine either.
Kim: So, do you want to talk about guns? Or, how about music. I used to play bass in a rock band when I lived in South Africa.
Pumpman: No shit? I used to play guitar for a living.
GOC: I play guitar, too, though the only time I ever played professional was at a wedding.
Hawkins: I knew this was a bad idea. Let's talk about Hillary Clinton.
Pumpman: She's even more of a bloodless cunt than my ex-wife.
Kim: Grrrrr!
Hawkins: Have any of you read her book?
GOC: The question should be has Hillary read her book yet?
Pumpman: I wouldn't even use her book for toilet paper.
Kim: Grrrrr! That bitch should fuck off and die!
Hawkins: So you guys don't think much of Hillary?
Pumpman: She's a BC.
Kim: She's a lying bitch.
GOC: I think she should be forced to give Bill blowjobs for the rest of her life.
Kim: I think Bill should be forced to read her book! That would serve that fat fuck right.
Pumpman: I've been walking around with a semi-boner for the last week.
Hawkins: Where did that come from?
Pumpman: We've been talking about Bill Clinton and blowjobs haven't we?
Hawkins: I've been trying to have an intelligent discourse on Hillary Clinton ...
Kim: Blam! Blam! Blam! Bitch! Everytime I think of her I want to shoot something and now I've put three holes in the wall. The Mrs. is really gonna be pissed off about this. It's a good thing we're only renting, but it looks like this will blow the security deposit.
Pumpman: Speaking of blowing, did you know that I have a bionic dick?
Hawkins: ... but you guys keep dragging this symposium down into the gutter.
Pumpman: Shit Hawkins! You need to put a little profanity on your site.
GOC: Fucking right!
Kim: Yeah! What's with this f*ck and sh*t stuff you do. Everyone knows it's fuck and shit.
Hawkins: Now I know why I've never tried this with you guys. We're done here. I'm gonna stick with a higher class of bloggers from now on. Thanks for nothing.
Kim: Yeah. Fuck it. I'm off to the range.
GOC: Man thish ish good wine.
Pumpman: My dick hurts.
Posted by denny at July 16, 2003 08:52 PM