To: Weslie Clerk Big General of the Army
From: Barbra Streisand
Dear Weasley,
I want to commend you for taking Harold Dean to task on his statement that he wanted the Democratic Party to be the party of the goobers in pickup trucks with confederate flags on the windows. How disgusting! Those are the people who voted for that Hitler clone George Bush. I swear, if he gets reelected I will leave the country.
I agree with you that we want the dumb people in pickup trucks to vote for Democrats. All they have to do is take the confederate flag off their trucks and they'll be OK. That is what you meant, right? After all, the Democratic Party knows what is best for the people, especially those dumb ones who don't know how to take care of themselves. That's why we are here. We care.
If you can't find a job because of the Bush recession but still want to have a large family, you need to vote for Democrats. We are the party that cares for people. We realize you may be dumb and unable to read or write and therefore cannot get a high paying job, but you still should be able to live the American dream. That is why there is a Democratic Party. We'll take the money from those evil rich Republicans and give it to you.
I'm sorry Willesy that I won't be voting for you since I'm behind Jim Looberman since he's Jewish. If only Bill Clinton would run again. I heard he wasn't running because of something to do with that contstitution thingy. Can't we make an exception this time? After all, he was the greatest president this country has ever seen and he did let me sleep in the Lincoln bedroom.
Since Bill won't run, I would vote for his wife Helen over Joey. Either he or you would make a great vice-president if Hester were president. She's the one who should really be running the country. We don't need a father figure as president. We need a mother figure and what a mother Hattie would make. I can just hear all the Republcans wail about what a mother Heloise was. Look at what a good job she did with her daughter, Cheryl.
And I have a fantastic idea on how we could conteract all the money that Adolph Bush is raising. Why don't we send the Dixie Chicks out on a fundraising tour. They're real popular with the dumb people who drive pickup trucks. I'd offer to do it, but I just don't deal too well with stupid poor people. I can't even talk to my maid, Conchita. I wish she would learn English!
Luv ya,
Babs
Posted by denny at November 13, 2003 08:34 PM Category: Faxes From Babs