Dear Fans

To: President of my Fan Club
From: Barbra Streisand

Dear Fans:

Not too much to be thankful about this Thanksgiving. The good things:

1. That little tart Rachel Lucas is no longer writing bad things about me and other smart and talented people like Jim Clooney and Mickey More. I won't have to worry about her writing lies about Earl Franklin and his bestselling autobiography Lying Liars. If only I could get that disabled guy in Atlanta to quit making up things about me.

2. Adolph Bush's popularity is declining.

3. Helen Clinton showed that she really cares about the troops by visiting them in Afgonistan.

4. I'm still beautiful.

The bad things:

1. Our Nazi president went to Irak as a publicity stunt. Whereas Heloise Clinton had a serious sitdown Thanksgiving dinner with a small group of army people, Busch pretended he was just a regular guy by actually serving dinners. What a phony! I agree with Jim Lockhart who said, "This is a president who has been unwilling to provide his presence to the families who have suffered but thinks nothing of flying to Baghdad to use the troops there as a prop."

2. CBS gave in to the right wing media and the Vast Right Wing Conspiracy by censoring the mini-series that my husband Jim was in and decided to show it on Showtime instead. Jim was crushed! This role was going to be a big break for him. After all, the only work he has had the past few years has been doing those Amway transmission commercials. As an aside, this has affected his sexual performance. I've tried to get him to take those Niagra pills, but he won't do it.

3. The tax cuts that have bankrupted our country. We need to elect as many Democrats as we possibly can so they can raise taxes and create another budget surplus.

4. The California recall where once again the Republicans overturned the results of an election. We now have a foreigner running California intead of real Americans like Grey Davis and Cruise Bustamouth.

5. The war in Irak where we are losing hundreds of men everyday. The carnage simply has to stop. This phony war on terrorism is bankrupting our country and has made the rest of the world hate us. We need to ask the terrorists what they want and give it to them. Then, we can bring the troops home. I know if we can elect enough Democrats that is what will happen.

6. We have too many Democratic candidates running for the nomination. We need to hurry up and decide on our candidates so we can start our campaign aginst our fascist/Nazi president. I think Looberman/Clinton would be a dream ticket.

So, I implore you, wonderful fans, besides buying my CD's , send all the money you can to Democrats so we can take back the country next year. We need higher taxes and we need to bring the troops home. If that happens, and my husband gets a job, I will indeed have a Happy Thanksgiving next year.

Luv ya,
Babs

Posted by denny at November 28, 2003 11:54 AM  Category: Faxes From Babs