May 16, 2005

Monday Pun 5-16-2005

Today's pun was sent to me by Tom and another person.

We have a new pope, but I know there is one particularly qualified and distinguished man who was not selected.

Bishop Hans Grapje was raised in a Catholic school in Minneapolis. As a young man, he aspired to become a priest, but was drafted into the army during WWII. He spent two years flying aboard B17s as a co-pilot until, in 1943, his aircraft was shot down and he lost his left arm.

Hans spent the remainder of the war as a chaplain giving spiritual advice and last rites to dying soldiers, allied and enemy. He was renowned for his ecumenical tenderness and compassion.

After the war, Grapje became a priest and served as a missionary throughout Africa. In spite of his handicap, he was noted for piloting his own bush plane into the deepest, most primitive villages to spread the church's message and charity to the impoverished.

In 1997, then Archbishop Grapje was serving at an outpost in Zimbabwe, when an explosion in one of the country's vast silver mines caused a catastrophic cave-in. The archbishop, in spite of his seniority, went down into several of the shafts to administer last rites to those who would never escape. He was in one of these shafts when it partially caved in, trapping him and several rescuers.

Although he was rescued three days later, he suffered several painful
injuries, including one that cost him his right eye. Additionally, the silver content in the shaft's air supply had poisoned him, causing his skin to take an indigo hue - a condition known as purpura - that persists to this day.

Although the Cardinal has devoted, and indeed risked, his life in the
service of God for nearly 70 years, as a scholar, a mentor, and the epitome of a holy man, church politics precluded his ascension to the Papacy.

Why, you may ask?


Church leaders have made it clear they just don't want a one-eyed, one armed, flying, purple, Papal leader.

Posted by denny at May 16, 2005 12:00 AM  
Comments

Ow! That's too much. ROFLMAO!

Posted by: Jack on May 16, 2005 11:37 AM

WOW. That's rich.

Posted by: Josh on May 16, 2005 01:00 PM

*Groan*

Posted by: EatShiz on May 16, 2005 04:24 PM

Thats as bad as our local priest, Father Sicola.
He was passed over time and again for promotions in the church even though he is a dedicated servant. When he could take no more, he went to Cardinal Law and asked him personally why. The cardinal replied that even though he was a great priest, loyal, charitable, etc. His rise needed to be stopped before it started because the church was not ready to be led by Pope Sicola.

Posted by: jeremy on May 17, 2005 01:19 AM

Once again, you need to be dragged off and shot.

Posted by: Acidman on May 17, 2005 10:46 AM
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