Oppressing Day

Holy Crap! Did I ever have a good time today oppressing the masses. It was a joyous day for a capitalist like myself.

I had a 10:00 AM appointment at my periodontist. The poor peasant dental hygienist that I oppressed by making her clean my teeth is doing so poorly that she just bought a house. I'm sure that her boss, whom I opressed by giving him business ain't doing so well since he raised his prices yet again.

After I left his office it was off to the bank where I oppressed a loan officer by signing a bunch of forms to get myself an home equity line of credit to the tune of $80,000. That loan officer was really sweating. This opression shit is lots of fun.

I got home and started surfing the net looking for new people to oppress. Damned if I wasn't able to piss of my good buddy, Shizgirl. I commented on this this post about her white trash neighbors that she should buy a house. (Please do not post rude comments on her site. Believe it or not, she is a friend.) She told me to lend her some money to buy a house and then laughed at me for still being on dialup. Crap! I'm a stupid capitalist, but I am rich! BWAHAHAHAHA!

About this time, my cleaning lady arrived. Holy shit! Here's someone else to oppress. I always make sure there is Diet Coke in the fridge and Snickers in the freezer. Crap! I was out of Snickers and since I was partying over the weekend in Nawlins with all the elite conservative bloggers who hate the poor and want to see them starve I didn't go to the store to replenish my supply of Snickers. Suffer bitch! I did let her go out to my garden and pick my tomatoes. I even gave her some of them.

So, while she was slaving and cleaning my house, I drove down to Shepherd Center to work out. I took my Nissan pickup. Who knows how many people were oppressed assembling this vehicle.

So I got to the weight room. Oh boy. Here's a chance to oppress some more peasants. After all, I pay good money to support the employees. Peasants! Crap! I couldn't figger out anything for them to do to help me. Wasn't able to oppress them. Major league downer. On second thought, there is Tennille, whom I would love to oppress. What a freaking babe!

The only way I was able to restore my spirits was by thinking about what I was gonna use my line of credit for. I was gonna be able to oppress a bunch of Mexicans. Y'see, the first project I have in mind is having a bunch of carpet ripped up and having hardwood floors installed. This is manual labor (Or is it Manuel labor?) which will entail oppressing a whole shitload of Mexicans. No construction work is done in Atlanta without Mexicans.

The next project is having tile installed in the master bath. Then, I'm having hardwood ripped up in the kitchen and having tile installed. The last project is having my patio behind the house extended and having stone borders installed around all of my beds. We're talking a good two years of oppressing Mexicans. Christ! I'm getting an erection just imagining all of this shit.

Tonight for dinner, I had some pasta. But, before I ate, I drank some Stoli on the rocks with a couple of Spanish olives. How good does that make me feel? I oppressed some Russkis by drinking the Vodka they had to produce and some Spaniards by eating the olives they had to pick. And to oppress some more Spaniards, I drank a Spanish wine with dinner. Pick them grapes! Smash them grapes! Make them into wine!

I just love being a rich and oppressive capitalist. In a later post I will tell y'all how to be rich like me.

Until then, fuck the poor! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Posted by denny at July 27, 2005 09:23 PM