Photoshop done by Matt at StarkTruth
Holy crap! Michael Moore is signing up to go to a fat farm. No, I'm not kidding.
The creator and director of Fahrenheit 9/11 reportedly is forking up $3,800-a-week for a weight loss crash course.
Hey Mikey, give me $2000 a week and I'll lock you up in a storage shed. You've got enough blubber on you that you that you wouldn't have to eat for at least a month. And maybe if he put the fork down once in a while, he wouldn't have to fork over $3800 per week.
Moore registered at Pritikin Longevity Center and Spa in Aventura, Fla. On the training menu: learning to cook healthy meals and "life re-education."
Yeah, like Mikey cooks his own meals. Why not just teach him how to push himslef away from the farking table.
The reported goal for the portly Moore - shed 12 pounds during the first three weeks.
Wait! Wait! I know that joke. How can Michael Moore lose 12 pounds of ugly fat? Cut off his head.
Posted by denny at August 23, 2005 09:15 PMI heard the corporate headquarters of "Old Country Buffet" issued a statement this afternoon. All it said was "Thank god!". Shares of Old Country Buffet stock rose 25% after the annoucement by Moore.
Posted by: Rob Cooper on August 23, 2005 10:01 PMHere's an idea...Why doesn't the fat f*cker sign up for Celebrity Fit Club (VH1)? Summer proves to be difficult to find good shows and VH1 fills the void. My life is hopeless. :D
Posted by: mashby on August 23, 2005 10:05 PMThis is so funny, 3 800 $ a week to learn what is healthy food??
Well that's basic food you know, beef with salt, salad and tomatos with oil and vinegar (no sugar), don't drink sugar (soda) or too much beer (one or two a day), you can eat meat, pasta, vegetables, everything with low fat and low sugar and low alcohol.
No icecream, no popcorns, no soda, no sweet sauce, no fat sauce, no Mc Donalds, no candies, no donuts etc... well I bet you knew it !!
You don't even need to do sport.
Now give ME the money Mickey, it's 10 000 $ and I swear it works :)))
Posted by: Pierce on August 24, 2005 03:29 AM"Wait! Wait! I know that joke. How can Michael Moore lose 12 pounds of ugly fat? Cut off his head."
That would be one appendage to his torso, that if removed, wouldn't impact his overall IQ one iota, even though it is only a low single digit number to begin with. Heh.
Posted by: Vulgorilla on August 24, 2005 08:06 AMHe could lose 12 pounds with a little plastic surgery to remove the 'ugly'.
Posted by: scrapiron on August 24, 2005 12:03 PMHmmm....he must be a rich man....?
Now how did he make all that money?
Exploiting 9/11 and now the War in Iraq????? Hmmmmm.....
Slandering the President? Hmmmmm....
Are we sure he isn't a closet Republican...seems he does all the things he hates about the GOP....
Regardless how much weight he loses, he will still be ugly....
Posted by: Vicki on August 24, 2005 03:32 PMI love that term, "life re-education"...sounds like a gentle term for strapping him into a chair, prying his eyes open, and forcefully conditioning him to become nauseous at the sight of grease.
"A Clockwork Orange 2: A Healthy Life For Mikey"
--TwoDragons
Posted by: Denita TwoDragons on August 24, 2005 06:16 PM