From Richard.
A sailor was driven off course by a storm and smashed into a small island. The next morning, he awoke on the beach. The sand and sky were red. Walking around in a daze, the sailor saw red birds, red grass, red trees and red bananas. He was shocked to find that even his skin was red. "Oh, no!" he exclaimed.
"I'm marooned!"
And a bonus from Woody.
This guy checked into a room at a motel and he said to the dude at the desk, "I hope the porn channel in my room is disabled."
"No," the dude replied, "it's regular porn, you sick bastard."
Posted by denny at May 11, 2009 12:00 AMok, the porn joke was much better.
Posted by: pdwalker on May 11, 2009 02:07 AMI don't get either one!!
Posted by: ty guy on May 11, 2009 03:49 AMWhadda Maroon! Whadda nin-cow-poop!
Posted by: Fawteen on May 11, 2009 07:08 AMI think the small island must have been Cuba.
Posted by: Schmidty on May 11, 2009 12:02 PMWe're always so pun_ctilious and pun_itive about Denny's puns. At least, he is always pun_ctual on Monday. We should take it a pun ourselves to find him a good pun_gent pun instead of pun_ching him all the time.
Posted by: Claudia on May 11, 2009 01:34 PMRed Sky in the morning, sailor take warning.
Red sky at night, sailors delight.
Poor sailor has to wait 12 hours.
Loved the disabled porn pun. There has to be a bad joke in there somewhere.
Posted by: James Macklin on May 11, 2009 09:47 PMA long time ago, a passenger ship sank in the Pacific Ocean. The only survivor was a young boy. He swam to a tropical island and was able to survive by eating things he found on the island. He was also able to build a shelter, and lived there quite happily, although alone.
About 15 years later, there was another shipwreck. This time, the only survivor was a young lass of about 20. When she swam ashore, she saw the young man. She asked him, "Who are you? Where are we?" At first, he couldn't speak, but then his language skills returned. "We're on some tropical island in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. That's all I know."
She asked, "How long have you been here?" He replied, "All I can remember is being on this island." She asked, "What do you do all day?" He responded, "Well, sometimes I fish, sometimes I climb the trees to get coconuts to eat, and sometimes I just dig for clams."
She then asked, "What do you do for sex?" He looked puzzled. "Sex? What is sex?" She then proceeded to show him about sex.
When they were done, she asked, "What did you think about that?" He smiled and said, "Wow! That was great! But look what you did to my clam-digger!"
--chicopanther
Posted by: chicopanther on May 12, 2009 09:00 AM