Yannow, I love my two BMW's but I draw the line at having sex with them, at least not in public. Link from Toejam.
ALBUQUERQUE (KRQE) - An Albuquerque man faces indecent exposure charges after police say children saw him simulating a sex act with his car in a grocery store parking lot.
I knew New Mexico was a little weird when I ordered some Nebbiolo wine in a restaurant in Las Cruces and was told that it was a sweet wine. Nebbiolo sweet? This is the grape that is used in the Piedmont area of Italy to make mighty Barolo and Barbaresco wines.
Danny Brawner, 46, was indicted on two counts of aggravated indecent exposure and one count of indecent exposure for the July 28 incident in the parking lot of the Smith's Food and Drug store on 101 Coors Blvd. NW, according to a news release from Bernalillo County District Attorney Kari Brandenburg's office.Witnesses told police they saw Brawner "humping" his car's trunk while swinging his arms in the air and shouting. His pants were around his ankles, witnesses said.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! No word in whether or not the car enjoyed it.
An officer said he found Brawner asleep next to his car. The officer woke him up and arrested him. The officer said Brawner appeared to be intoxicated.
Ya think?
Two children saw the alleged sex act, which is why Brawner faces the aggravated indecent exposure charges. They're fourth-degree felonies.If convicted on all counts, Brawner could be sentenced to serve up to four years in prison and attend mandatory counseling.
If convicted of the aggravated indecent exposure charge, under New Mexico law, Brawner would have to register as a sex offender.
Can you imagine having to explain your sex offender status by saying you boinked your car?
Posted by denny at August 17, 2009 12:01 PMAfter all that car sex I wonder if he was exhausted.
Posted by: thatjerryguy on August 17, 2009 01:39 PMThat brings an entirely new meaning to the term "Auto-erotica"
Posted by: Roger on August 17, 2009 01:57 PMDoes that have anything to do with how GM is screwing us?
Posted by: John Galt on August 17, 2009 02:43 PMUm, was it a Lamborghini?
Posted by: B....... on August 17, 2009 02:56 PMPecker in the tailpipe or did he have a gas nozzle in his pants? Fucking weirdos!
Posted by: kerrcarto on August 17, 2009 10:20 PMThey have this leagallized in San Francisco. and want to in our state of Oregon (Keep it Wierd Portland)
Silverton Mayor does it regularly
as for Me ....ok,,,,,,if you want to tho' a Pecker in the TailPipe is mandatory tho'
I remember being told that indecent simply meant your balls slapped.
Too bad he didn't go to the front, open the hood and get his winkie near the fan for a blow job.
What?!? Toejam hasn't commented on the BMW's headlights?
Opportunity missed.
Posted by: Jon on August 18, 2009 11:03 AMumm I'm not sure how I should feel about this story are we now doing erotica or is it really a crime. Now it is a shame that those 2 kids had to witness this but maybe we could just put him on a street corner with a sign saying "I BOINKED A CAR"
and let the general population handle the humiliation. Which, knowing people in America, would cause much more punishment than 4 months in jail ever would. Just saying maybe we've gotten to "jail happy" and need to look at alternatives
It's one thing to see a Lamborghini into which you'd wanna stick your weenie...
...but it's quite another to actually try and do it. Yeef.
Posted by: Elisson on August 18, 2009 02:13 PMThanks Elisson - I was afraid I was alone.....
Posted by: B....... on August 18, 2009 11:19 PMwhile swinging his arms in the air and shouting.
No mention if the shouting was actually shreiks of pain. Did this happen during daylight hours? Imagine how hot the sheetmetal would be after baking in the New Mexico sun.
The officer said Brawner appeared to be intoxicated.
Ironic that the incident happened at 101 Coors Blvd, NW!