October 29, 2009

Welfare Office

A joke for the Jug Hussein Ears' economy. He owns it now.

A guy walked into the local welfare office to pick up his check. He marched straight up to the counter and said, "Hi. You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

The social worker behind the counter said, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a Chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful daughter."

"You'll have to drive around in his 2008 Mercedes-Benz CL, and he will supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her overseas holiday trips."

"This is rather awkward to say but you will also have as part of your job assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong sex drive."

"A two-bedroom loft type apartment with plasma TV, stereo, bar, etc. located above the garage, will be designated for your sole use and the salary is $200,000 a year."

The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said, "You're bullshittin' me!"

The social worker said, "Yeah, well . . You started it."

Sent to me by many readers.

Posted by denny at October 29, 2009 04:07 PM  

Here in California many of my state worker friends have 3 'furlough Fridays' each month (thanks to our Governator, Arnie), yet the EDD State Unemployment office is hiring. What's wrong with this picture?? I keep saying they have LOTS of applications, why not recycle and use them instead as job applications for those positions? Oh yeah, because these days it's referred to as "FUnEmployment"...

Posted by: karen on October 29, 2009 05:38 PM


My heart bleeds for the Kalifornia welfare reci,,
I mean Kalifornia State Workers.

I've been laid-off since June, 2008. Kiss my ass.

If you check, you'll find that the EDD website has been off line since October 23rd.

I check it every day, and have for the past year and a half.


There isn't an asshole working for the State of Kalifornia that can "Enact" a Fire Wall.

Three (3) day furlough?? They only work 1 in every 10. Screw your Incompatent Union Shits.

Have a nice day.


Posted by: Pete on October 30, 2009 12:16 AM

Best joke this year.

Fuck the Incompetent Union Shits.

Screw is too lite.

Posted by: Mike S. on October 30, 2009 08:41 AM

Pete - Karen is on our side. She's a conservative living in Loony Land.

Posted by: Denny on October 30, 2009 10:50 AM

When I lived in CA the welfare office was filled with illegals who couldn't speak english. I applied (I'm white) after hubby ran off and left me with 3 kids to support. I applied for welfare and was turned down because I made more than $200/mo (I made $80/wk before taxes). But, those illegals all got their welfare. I was pissed and still am after over 20 years. If you don't speak english, you will get everything handed to you, but try and help yourself, and you get screwed. Thank God I don't live in CA anymore.

Posted by: Madalyn on October 30, 2009 11:20 AM


I am sorry, My wrath was directed at the State.

Every time I hear about 3 day furloughs for
State employees, I blow a gasket.

He who has a job should not complain.

Sorry again.


Posted by: Pete on October 30, 2009 07:48 PM

Dear Mike S.

Yes Mike, "Screw" is too light.


Posted by: Pete on October 30, 2009 11:10 PM

Dear Karen, Denny and Mike S.,

The unemployment site in Kalifornia is still down.

The Bay Bridge in San Francisco is falling down.

And did you hear about the woman who was raped in Long Beach?

The Police ask if she had any idea who raped her.

She said. "I think it was a CalTrans worker".

"Why do you think that Miss?" ask the detective.

She replied' "Because he was wearing an orange vest and I had to do all of the work".

Have a nice day.


Posted by: Pete on October 30, 2009 11:25 PM


I may be drawing the wrath here, but Kentucky is about to go to furloughs. My sister is a state worker there, and going from a five day week to a possibly four or three entails a pay cut. They are simply staggering the non-"vital" jobs to save money. I am guessing that furlough is different from place to place. I just don't know if it is right to assume that all State Workers are dredges drawing an unearned paycheck.

Posted by: Dkelsmith on October 31, 2009 01:43 AM
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