You may wonder why there was no post yesterday. There was no time and I was too tired.
Sherry and Ryan (my sister and her husband)arrived late Tuesday night. I was in bed but awake. I did not sleep well that night.
Wednesday morning, after breakfast, Ryan and I hopped in my truck to go to Home Depot and get some supplies. The first Orange Aproned Expert we asked for assistance was helpful. It was all down hill from there. We needed six landscape timbers to build up one of my raised beds. We needed two of them cut in half. This was not an impossible task, since I had had it done multiple times at this particular store.
Home Depot used to have the landscape timbers in 8 foot lengths and 4 foot lengths. Not anymore. Since my beds are 8 feet by 4 feet we need to have Home Depot cut them for us.
I purposely went to the Dunwoody store rather than the Doraville store, which is closer, because the Dunwoody store gives better service, or at least they used to.
The second Orange Aproned Expert, whom the first one had sent us to, said that she needed to find another Orange Aproned Expert to perform the task. In the meantime, we found the trash bags and the nails we needed.
We went back to the second Orange Aproned Expert and paid for everything. She still had not located the third Orange Aproned Expert who would do our cutting.
I went to get the truck. I drove to the area where the landscape timbers were and another Orange Aproned Expert told me I couldn't park there. Ryan told this Orange Aproned Expert that I wasn't planning to park there but I did need to have the truck close to the landscape timbers for ease of loading. He then asked her if traffic management was in her job description.
She informed him, somewhat curtly, that she was the manager of this particular department. Here we were able to observe the Peter Principle in action.
She told me I could park next to the timbers and we started loading the truck. We told her that we needed to have two of the timbers cut in half and she said that she didn't know if they could do that. I informed her that they had been able to do that last year and asked why it would be a problem this year.
She appeared flustered but found yet another Orange Aproned Expert who took two of the timbers and said he'd try to have them cut. While we were waiting, the Orange Aproned Expert manager, who was in a position beyond her abilities, told us we should call ahead the next time we needed this seemingly difficult, well nigh impossible, task performed. The other Orange Aproned Expert somehow managed to perform the seemingly difficult, well nigh impossible task and returned with the cut timbers. We now got underway on our next quest which was getting 12 bales of pine straw.
When we arrived at the pine straw truck there was a landscape guy with a trailor, a little old lady with the trunk of her car open, and us. Unfortunately, there was not a single Orange Aproned Expert to be found. The landscape guy said there were two of them when he arrived, but they disappeared as he was backing his trailor up to the truck.
After waiting for five minutes for someone to appear, Ryan and the landscape guy went inside to try to get some assistance.
My buddy, Wahoo, and I had this happen to us once before and rather than waiting, we loaded my truck ourselves and gave ourselves two extra bales for our efforts.
Ryan and the landscape guy returned and they decided to put the three bales the little old lady had bought in the trunk of her car so she could get on her way. The problem with her getting on her way, she informed us, was that she was not very good at backing up. Ryan said he would direct her.
He got behind her car and gave her the international symbol for backing up. She was doing fine until he gave her the international symbol for stopping which she ignored. He then gave her the English language symbol for stopping which is yelling "Stop!". She ignored that. He then was forced to give her the international panic symbol for stopping which entails hitting the trunk of the car while jumping out of the way and yelling "Stop!". That worked.
She was now far enough back to turn and make her merry way home with her load of pine straw.
We were still waiting for an Orange Aproned Expert.
One finally arrived and the landscape guy got his trailor loaded. Now all we had to do was wait for him to move so we could back up next to the truck and get loaded. Alas, the landscape guy did not immediately drive off. He decided to make a call on his cellphone. in the interest of safety he was probably a proponent of not driving while talking on a cellphone. Although this is good for safety, it sucks when other people are waiting for you to MOVE YOUR FARKING TRAILOR SO WE COULD GET SOME FARKING PINE STRAW!
Ryan gave him a dirty look and he decided that discretion was the better part of valor and he went on his merry way.
We got loaded up and we went on our merry way and drove back to GOC Central all the while thinking that next time we may go to Home Depot's major competitor.
After Ryan unloaded the truck it was time to start pruning. Ryan pruned; Sherry and I bagged. We worked for two hours, took a lunch break, and went back to work. We filled up another 20 bags.
Ryan spread the pine straw on the bare spots that I had weeded on the Great Berm of Dunwoody. With the weeding, the blooming thrift, and the pine straw, the Great Berm of Dunwoody looks better than it has in years. Ryan also built up the bed that I'm using for compost this year. We got everything accomplished that we had planned and it was a good thing we did.
After getting cleaned up, I cooked a steak dinner that couldn't be beat. We had smoked slamon as an appetizer. I grilled filet mignon, nuked baked potatoes in the microwave, tossed a salad, and cooked corn on the cob on the grill. I had previously opened and decanted a 1998 Gigondas. Ryan and I drank a nice Sauterne wine after dinner.
We all went to bed tired and sore but with full stomachs.
About 3:00 AM it began to rain. I slept through it but it woke up Ryan and Sherry. We had left the full bags of yard waste in the back yard. Ryan and Sherry moved them to the garage to get them out of the rain. It is supposed to rain the rest of the day and tonight so I won't be able to have them out for the trash pickup on Friday. My garage smells of eau de yard waste.
After breakfast, Ryan and Sherry headed back to Columbia in the rain. I went back to bed and took a nap.
I'm going to my friend Brian's for dinner tonight.
It didn't start out so well. I woke up and my left knee was throbbing. Need! Some! Drugs! Took some and it got better.
Opened up the Atlanta Urinal and Constipation and got some great news! For those of you who came here via Little Green Footballs, yes, Cynthia McCommunist is my Congresscritter, but only until 2006! They posted the new congressional districts and Beautiful Dunwoody is moving to John Lindner's district.
Normally congressional districts are redrawn every ten years, and normally I would be against redrawing them now, but the Dimocrats did such a horrible gerrymandering in 2000 (and the fact that I'm in Jihad Cindy's district) that I was hoping they would redraw them early. All that awaits is the Governor's signature (and any court challenge) and it's a done deal.
Had lunch with my friend Brian today. It was a beautiful day, so I took the Z3 and put the top down. 90 mph on 285 with the stereo blaring. Yeah. That's the ticket. Got off on my exit, the light was green, whipped around the corner, put the rear end into a little drift and punched it. Yeah, baby!
Brian got me all caught up on the gossip. Long time readers will remember my posts about our dealings with the Germans. We were trying to take over the mainframe hosting of IBM Education in Europe. I told my CDSM® (Clueless Dipshit Manager) many times that it wouldn't happen and why it wouldn't happen. The IBM organization in Europe couldn't afford to lose the business because they couldn't lay their workers off. They would undercut any price we quoted. They did. My team lead said that Germany would probably offer to do our hosting. They just did. I'm glad I'm retired.
After lunch, I drove back home with the top down and the stereo blaring. It was in the mid 70's, just an ideal top down day.
If I have too many more days like today, I may have to rename this site Mellow Old Cripple.
Tonight there is a Sommelier Guild of Atlanta wine function at Grace, a new restaurant in Norcross which makes it very close to GOC Central. Here is the menu and the wines we're having. They are all Pinot Noirs.
Oregon Flight
Van Duzer Estate 2002 (top 100 wines Wine Spectator) Chehalem "Ridgecrest vineyard" 2002 (Robert Parker 92 points) Lemelson "Thea's Select" 2002
Ken Wright "Carter Vineyard" 2002 (RP 90)
Pan roasted Wild Salmon in Shredded Potato Wrap, Spring Asparagus Puree
California Flight
Chalone 2002, Talley "Rincon vineyards" 2002 (RP 94) Belle Glas "Clark & Telegraph vineyard" 2002. Siduri "Pisoni vineyard" 2003 ( RP 90)
Baby Lamb Chops, Wild Mushrooms, Roasted Shallot Demiglace
Burgundy Flight
Vincent Girardin Corton Bressandes Grand Cru 2002 (RP 92) F. Magnien Morey St. Denis premier cru Clos Baulet 1999. Daniel Rion Nuits St. Georges Les Vignes Rondes 1993
Butternut Squash and Camembert Ravioli, Grilled Duck Breast, Sage Butter
If I can remember, I'll take notes tonight and let y'all know my favorites.
Edgar is an idiot!
If the bitch hadn't fired Sarah, they would not have been so shorthanded and they would have known about the missing pilot's family.
The Mummy is still at large.
I sent the following e-mail to Cynthia Tucker who runs the editorial page at the Atlanta Urinal and Constipation. Prior to the 2002 Dimocrat primary, Ms. Tucker excoriated McKinney in her columns. Last election, she endorsed her.
Ms Tucker,
In light of Cynthia McKinney's rantings, sponsored by International ANSWER an anti-American, Marxist organization as documented by these links,
http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=15172_Cynthia_McKinney_on_Voting&only=yes
http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=15189&only=yes
http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=15228_Cynthia_McKinney_on_Foreign_Policy_Part_1&only=yes
how do you feel about your endorsement of Cynthia McKinney? I seem to remember you writing about how, after losing her seat in the 2002 election, she would be much more moderate if elected. I dunno. She sure sounds like the same old moonbat to me.
I also wonder why the AJC hasn't mentioned her latest rantings. And people wonder why newspaper readership is down in this country.
I'm curious to see if she will respond.
Ernie sent me a link to this article about my favorite country, Frogistan. Too bad Dirtbag Dirtbag no longer reads me.
Unhappy at work, in revolt at school and openly divided over Europe, the French have suddenly lost that joie de vivre that British holidaymakers and expatriates alike identify as so Gallic a trait.
Huh? What's going on?
A demoralised nation whose citizens are disillusioned by politicians, have nothing much to believe in and feel dissatisfied with their lot - that was the portrait of France painted in a recent survey of the country's mood.
But Jerkweed Jerkweed said that France was such a great nation with their 35 hour work week and all those lavish benefits that the gummint has mandated.
The slump in national morale has coincided with - is perhaps driven by - an uncharacteristic fit of scepticism about the European Union and its new constitution.
The great European Union that is gonna be the United States of Europe and will overtake the United States in economic power. So what has the Frogs up in arms?
Only months ago, positive attitudes to Europe were acknowledged to be one of the few constants of French political life. France, after all, was a proud parent of the infant Common Market and has long seen the EU as its own private project.Europe was just another arena in which France could perform its historic mission: spreading the values of liberté, egalité and fraternité to nations less civilised than itself.
Why do the French have long noses? So they can look down on the rest of Europe.
As for the referendum ratifying the constitution, President Jacques Chirac seemed to face only one serious obstacle to carrying his people with him: its timing.
What obstacle was that?
His courtiers began talking up the merits of an early poll - Mr Chirac had previously spoken of late summer - but their principal concern was that hostility to Turkey's eventual membership of the EU should not gather strength and pollute the high-minded debate over Europe's principles and values.
Principles? Values? WTF?
But having moved the vote forward to May 29, Mr Chirac watched in dismay as other issues conspired to threaten his European vision.
And those issues are?
Two recent opinions polls have put the No campaign ahead for the first time, confirming Mr Chirac's worst fears that the electorate may use the referendum to register its disgust with him, his government and its lot in life.
The French unhappy with their gummint? How can that be?
The national malaise extends far beyond the realm of politics. Despite the Frenchman's traditional delight in good food and wine, restaurateurs, especially in areas hardest hit by a slump in tourism, complained bitterly about empty tables last summer.
That's the downside of that high Euro. It plays havoc with that tourism thing.
People were eating out less. Prices were too high and service too poor.
And this is different from normal?
Not that most French people would blame the punitive cost of employing staff and the enforced shorter working week for their unsatisfactory experience dining out. But in their hearts, the French know that the 35-hour week has been a disaster. However noble the idea of giving working mothers more time with their children, the social and economic cost has been high.
But Scumbag Scumbag was bragging about the wonderful 35 hour work week.
Companies have flocked to relocate to the cheaper labour markets of eastern Europe and beyond. The service industry resorts increasingly to the black economy.
Globalization versus socialism. You make labor too expensive (35 hour work week, paid leave, long vacations) and companies will relocate where labor is cheaper. Hence the 10% unemployment rate in Frogistan.
The government itself seems motivated by a desire for the quiet life. And it is no coincidence that France's restless unions, aware of Mr Chirac's growing nervousness about the referendum, have sent their members into the streets in huge numbers.
Holy shit! Look at all them croaking frogs!
France notoriously caves in at the first signs of trouble from the workforce,
France surrenders to itself.
whether from the seamen, fishermen and hauliers who blockade motorways and ports, the transport workers who yesterday paralysed the rail network or schoolchildren protesting at reforms in the classroom.
And let's not forget the Germans.
Many French people are angered by the posturing and the strikes. But, according to the polls, even more are quicker to blame the government and employers for anything that goes wrong.And it is with that majority - uncomfortable with cancelled trains or health service walk-outs but even more uncomfortable with any threat to their rights and customs - that attacks on the spread of "liberalism" in Europe strike such a chord.
Awww! It is sure bleak in Frogistan.
When surgeons threatened to stage a week-long exile in Britain, it was not because they wished to show their admiration for the NHS. Rather, it symbolised "the nightmare" that awaited medical care in France if it followed too closely the British model.
But Dipshit Dipshit said France had one of the best health care systems in the world. Socialized medicine is the way to go.
The French actually feel that if their country is made more disciplined and more responsive to market forces, their way of life, imperfect and anarchic as it often is, would be under threat.
Merde! Not the free market. How could the Frogs survive without socialism?
But for all the evidence of a country more and more ill at ease with itself, another powerful national characteristic should never be underestimated.If the French rarely see themselves as bad drivers and arrogant or unfriendly towards foreigners, they cheerfully own up to being among the world's worst complainers.
Touche!
The contrariness helps to explain why a bureaucrat will turn down a perfectly fair request and why voters so readily refuse to grant governments a second term.It also shows why the French now see Europe as too big for its boots and why Mr Chirac, determined to win the day on May 29, exploits the sentiment by "standing up" for national interests.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Brave ol' Jackoff Chirac.
Behind all this is a love of the one word "Non", even if it may later be softened to a "Oui, mais… ".Asking France to abandon its instinct for saying "no" is like asking a lion to stop chasing wildebeest. Lions are lions.
Frogs are frogs.
The French, as one British expatriate put it yesterday with irritation but not malice, are "just so bloody French".
How true!
This one comes from Jim From Downunder.
A group of retired folks who were all amateur banjo players got together and formed a banjo band.
They plucked away on their banjos happily, using a house of one of the group to meet. Soon there were too many players for the house, so they rented an old two-story shop.
They used the upper floor to meet and play their banjos, plucking away five days a week. To help with the rent, they sub-let the shop downstairs to a
small retailer.
After only three weeks, the retailer advised that he was moving out.
"Why?" they asked............................
"Too much pluckin' overhead"
It started raining here in Beautiful Dunwoody this morning. My sister and her husband originally planned to drive down to GOC Central Sunday afternoon and I was gonna treat them to a steak dinner.
On a side note, we always had ham for Easter dinner when I was growing up. Isn't that special. We celebrated the resurrection of a nice Jewish boy by eating pork. I said that to Cindy at the store on Saturday and I got a dirty look.
Normally, I grill a steak on Saturday night and get hammered on vodka and wine. My after dinner drink varies with the season. From Cindy's birthday until Easter, the after dinner drink is cognac, either Delamain XO or Delamain Vesper. Vesper is more expensive and harder to get. Surprisingly it did not go up in price. The XO went up $15. That makes Vesper an even better bargain. From Easter to Cindy's birthday my after dinner drink is either grappa or limoncello.
I was gonna drink in moderation Saturday night until my sister called and said since it was supposed to rain on Monday, when we were planning Day 3 of The Second Anmnual Dunwoody Pruning Party, they weren't coming down until Tuesday night. I threw their steaks in the freezer, grilled a steak for myself and got hammered. Slept late on Sunday.
I awoke this morning to rain. I love to sleep in the rain, so I rolled over and went back to sleep. Ahhhh!
I got the rest of my thrift planted Saturday and had nothing planned for Sunday so it was a nice relaxing day listening to the rain. The rain is also helping my thrift.
My sister told me there were supposed to be thunder boomers and tornados, but except for the occasional flash of lighting and some thunder it has been very calm. The closest lighting so far has been over three miles away.
I love thunder storms. Back in the 70's a buddy of mine and I rented a cabin at Lake of the Ozarks in Missouri. That was when I was living in St. Louis. I esperienced a few storms there. Our cabin was right on the lake and the thunder storms were awesome. We also had a window fan that had a tin overhang. The sound of rain on tin is delightful. I would sleep out on the porch when it rained.
Since it's still raining, and I feel very lazy, this is all I'm writing tonight. I'm just in too mellow of a mood to go off on a rant.
It's still raining. I hope it rains all night. I hope we have some thunder storms.
Long time reader and commenter Jesse Frank has started a blog and asked me to give him a plug. Ok. Here's the link. Now, his job is to give readers a reason to come back for more.
Sent to me by my very good friend Gwen. Gwen, I love ya even tho' you're a liberal.
From Woody.
NICK THE DRAGON SLAYER
Nick the Dragon Slayer had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the beautiful Queen's voluptuous breasts, but he knew the penalty for this would be death. One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague,
Horatio, the Physician, who was the King's chief doctor.
Horatio the Physician exclaimed that he could arrange for Nick the Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold coins to arrange it.
Without pause, Nick the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to
the scheme.
The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed.
Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense. Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio the Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva applied for four hours would cure this type of itch and that tests had shown that only the saliva of Nick the Dragon Slayer would work as the antidote to cure the
itch.
The King quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer.
Horatio the Physician then slipped Nick the Dragon Slayer the antidote for the itching powder, which he quickly put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent breasts.
The Queen's itching was eventually relieved and Nick the Dragon Slayer left satisfied and touted as a hero.
Upon returning to his chamber, Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the Physician demanding his payment of
1000 gold coins.
With his obsession now satisfied, Nick the Dragon Slayer couldn't have cared less and, knowing that Horatio the Physician could never report this matter to the King, shooed him away with no payment made.
The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder into the King's shorts. The King immediately summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer...
MORAL OF THE STORY: Pay your bills
From my friend Cindy.
1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unfuck you.
2. You say I'm a bitch -- like it's a bad thing.
3. Well this day was a total waste of make-up.
4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?
5. Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after.
6. Do I look like a people person?
7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.
8. I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.
9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?
11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
13. Do they ever shut up on your planet?
14. I'm not your type. I'm not inflatable.
15. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet.
16. Back off!! You're standing in my aura.
17. Don't worry. I forgot your name too.
18. I work 45 hours a week to be this poor.
19. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
20. Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
21. Chaos, panic and disorder ... my work here is done.
22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
23. You look like shit. Is that the style now?
24. Earth is full. Go home.
25. Aw, did I step on your poor itty bitty ego?
26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
27. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.
28. You are depriving some village of an idiot.
29. If assholes could fly, this place would be an airport.
From Ron.
For those of you who believe that I'm a diehard Republican and an unabashed Bush supporter, I have stated many times that the last election was a one issue election for me and that issue was the War On Terror. Bush would fight it. Kerry would not.
I think that at the meeting with Vincente Fox this past week, Bush should have told that asshole that he was pissed at his obstruction in the UN during the run up to the Iraq War. Furthermore, he should have kicked him in the nuts and told him to fuck off and he supported private citizens patrolling the border.
I think Bush is wrong on immigration. I think he and the Republicans are wrong on education and agriculture. Those are two departments that should be eliminated.
I think the Republican Congress has spent too much money and I think Bush should start using the veto pen.
I especially think every piece of pork going to West Virginia, the home state of Robert Kleagle Byrd,("$11,612,000 for projects in his state, including $4.4 million for GIS Center of Excellence at West Virginia University, $3.6 million for the Appalachian Fruit Laboratory in Kearneysville and $150,000 for turfgrass research in Beaver" - Cal Thomas). should be cut out of the budget. Remember those numbers the next time Senator Kleagle starts ranting about out of control spending.
The Republicans are bad but the Dimocrats are worse. We really need a viable third party in this country.
Beautiful blue eyes. Yummy! Just exactly what does Kim du Toit have against nipples?
One of my readers suggested this as an intro to Saturday Boobage.
What Religion is Your Bra?
A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife."
"What type of bra?" asked the clerk.
"Type?" inquires the man, "There's more than one type?"
"Look around," said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras in every shape, size, color and material imaginable. "Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from."
Relieved, the man asked about the types. The saleslady replied: "There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types. Which one would you prefer?"
Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them.
The Saleslady responded, "It is all really quite simple...
The Catholic type supports the masses.
The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen,
The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright, and
The Baptist makes mountains out of mole hills."
Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used to define bra sizes?
If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for, it is about time you became informed!
(A} Almost Boobs...
{B} Barely there.
{C} Can't Complain!
{D} Dang!
{DD} Double dang!
{E} Enormous!
{F} Fake.
{G} Get a Reduction.
{H} Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up !
They forgot the German bra: Holtzemfromfloppen
Someone, who shall ermain nameless, except to Greg and Brenda, sent me this picture and titled it Denny and Pumpman.
Which one of us should be pissed?
Dammit! I was going back through a whole bunch of e-mails and I found mucho Kerry cartoons that I cannnot use because they are no longer relevant. Arrrggghhh!
Once again, to all my readers who send me stuff, if I don't post it it's because I am overwhelmed with material or I've overlooked it.
If you send me Saturday Boobage or Monday Puns, rest assured, they will be posted eventually, unless, of course, I have already posted them.
I apologize to all of you who have sent me shit that I haven't used. As long as it remains timely, I will eventually use it.
I think my girlfriend is fooling around.
From Charlieb.
Had to go to the dentist today to get my teeth scraped. Then it was off to the credit union to get some money. Finally, to the liquor store to see if they had any Delamain Vesper. I was in luck! They did! This will be my last bottle until next fall. When this bottle is gone, it will be time to switch to grappa. Unfortunately, Michael told me that Green's no longer has the good grappa at a reasonable price that we've been drinking.
This afternoon, I finished clearing out the rest of the blackberry plants on the berm and got fifteen thrift plants in. Then I ran out of gas. My friend Cindy (as opposed to the other Cindys and Cynthias I'll write about tonight) was off and offered to pick up some more thrift at Home Depot but I feared, and rightly so, that I would not get the stuff I already had planted. Nine more to go.
I did take her out to dinner at the local Mexican place to bribe her into putting out the 20 bags of yard waste from Days 1 and 2 of the Great Dunwoody Pruning Party.
I wanted to start a discussion when I did my post on Terri Schiavo the other night and I did. This is the last I am gonna write on it. It's over. She's gonna die. Give it a rest. All I would do now would be to give her a morphine drip on the off chance that she might suffer. I don't believe she has enough brain left to suffer but why not drug the crap out of her? This has to be the only time commenter Jimmy and I have agreed on sumpin'.
There are more important things to write about, like how much I hate Cynthia McKinney. When Cynthia Tucker endorsed Cynthia McPiggy in the last election she stated that she thought Jihad Cindy had learned her lesson and would now be more moderate and would not act like a loony. If anything, the fact that she won the Dimocrat primary outright made her bolder. Her typical uneducated, poor, and stupid constituent says that Cynthia is just being Cynthia as if that justifies her acting like she is from another planet, or another country, like France.
I looked in the Atlanta Urinal and Constipation this morning to see if they had anything about this or this. Nope. Not a word. Maybe I should whip off an e-mail to Cynthia Tucker and ask her for her opinion on how Cynthia McCommunist has "learned her lesson" and has "moderated her tone".
Please notice that Cindy's talk was sponsored by ANSWER, a far left, anti-war, anti-American, socialist organization. In other words, an organization where both Cynthia McCommunist and Cynthia Tucker feel right at home.
When McPiggy was reelected to her old seat, my friend Michael, and many other readers, said I would not lack for stuff to write about. Look, I didn't need this bitch back to have stuff to write about. I live in the Atlanta area. There's always the Fulton County Police Department and the Fulton County Sheriff's Department. We also have the Fulton County District Attorney, Paul Howard, who's so fucking incompetent that Brian Nichols will probably get off. The Atlanta City Council just gave themselves a 22% pay raise. For what, I don't know. The Atlanta mayor is fighting with a private country club about spousal privileges for gay partners. The Atlanta area is a target rich environment even without McPiggy.
I would just like for Cynthia McKinney to go back to what she was doing the two years she was out of office. That is the only thing she is qualified to do.
Why I never went to my class reunion.
From Jesse.
The Republicans in Georgia, who now control both the legislative and the executive branches for the first time since Reconstruction, are redrawing Congressional districts. it cannot happen soon enough. My moonbat Congresscritter, Cynthia McCommunist, has wandered off the reservation again. She has taken up permanent residence in Moonbat City. Jon and Ernie sent me this link to Cynthia's latest ravings. I was wondering how long it would take until she started up again.
I've seen the new Congressional districts. I will not be in Cynthia's anymore. Make it happen! Soon!
I just hope the blacks and liberals in DeKalb and Fulton Counties are proud of this raving moonbat. And I also hope that Cynthia Tucker, who was partially responsible for turning Cynthia McCommunist out of office in the 2002 election, is proud of herself for endorsing her in the 2004 election. What am I saying? Of course she's proud. She's a gun grabbing, tax the rich liberal. She and McCommunist have a lot in common.
And if there is a God, I guess He's pissed off at me for being an atheist. Denise Majette claims that God told her to run for the Senate, thus allowing Cynthia to reclaim her seat.
Didja see the State of the Union speech? McCommunist arrived three hours early so she could get an aisle seat. She likes to be seen on national TV shaking hands with the president, even though she hates him. This year, Bush totally ignored her. BWAHAHAHAHA!
Hasn't Atlanta had enough bad press lately with the alleged Brian Nichols alleged fiasco? At least the Terri Schiavo crap knocked the incompetent Atlanta Police and Sheriff's departments off the news. With the incompetence you see in Atlanta gummint, is it any wonder that the part of Jihad Cindy's district that is in Atlanta votes for her? Arrrggghhh!
So redraw themn districts so I won't be in her district for the 2006 elections.
Do it now!
Uh oh! Douchebage Douchebag ain't gonna like this.
France's parliament voted to effectively rescind the 35-hour work week, raising overtime limits and letting private-sector employees swap time off for more money in a bid to boost employment and incomes.
But I thought the 35 hour work week was supposed to increase employment.
Chirac's backers said longer hours will increase wages and eventually reduce an unemployment rate of 10.1 percent, the highest in five years. A nationwide strike to protest the change and seek higher pay disrupted transport, schools, and postal service on March 10.
But according to Douchebag Douchebag the French economy was in better shape than the United States economy.
The 35-hour week has ``heavily weighed on wage increases,'' French Finance Minister Thierry Breton said March 15, responding to a question from a Socialist lawmaker in parliament. ``You wanted to share jobs, people had to share wages.''
Another socialist experiment bites the dust.
I had an 8:30 appointment at the BMW dealer to have some routine maintenance done on my Z3. Besides the oil change, I got the tires rotated and the coolant and brake fluids replaced per BMW recommendations. I stayed there while the stuff was done and read two back issues of The New Republic.
Wait a minute! You read The New Republic?
Yep! But that's a subject for another post.
When I went to pay for the services, my credit card was refused. Huh? WTF? I can check my balance online and I'm nowhere near my credit limit.
As an aside, the credit card companies hate me. I always pay off the balance in full. I have two other credit cards and those people fucked with me so I no longer use them. I live very well, but I do not live beyond my means. I never have. I never will, unless I'm told I have only six months to live, then, hello credit limits!
I called my credit union to ask them why the transaction was refused. They told me it was a swipe with a code of CVV. That means that it didn't read my magnetic strip properly. Here's an interesting tidbit they told me. Sometimes you can put a plastic bag over the credit card and reswipe it and it will work. To prevent this from happening in the future, they'll send me a new card.
I went back to the cashier and told her to try and enter the numbers manually. She did and everything worked. Now don't you think that she would have tried that after the swipe didn't work? I mean, this is a BMW dealership that prides itself on customer service. They always wash your car after servicing it. How hard would it have been to enter the transaction manually rather than making the customer check with his credit card company as to why the transaction was refused?
It's now after 12:00 and I punched up the local AM talk stations. Rush Limbaugh is talking about Terri Schiavo. Bill O'Reilly is talking about Terri Schiavo. Neal Boortz is reading his e-mail, and it is about Terri Schiavo. Holy crap! It's all Terri, all the time.
During The Second Annual Dunwoody Pruning Party, my sister was ranting about Terri Schiavo. My sister is more conservative than I am. Whereas I am a small l libertarian, she is an ardent conservative. She once voted for Pat Buchanen.
Paul e-mailed me and asked me to weigh in on Terri Schiavo. The reason I haven't up until now is because it is none of my business.
But that has never stopped you before in giving your bullshit opinion on anything.
True and here's my opinon on the Terri Schiavo situation.
Her husband is a major league scumbag who wants his "wife" to die. This guy has refused to allow any type of therapy or any other treatment that may improve his "wife's" condition. He has essentially remarried and has two children by his current "wife" with whom he has been living for the last ten years. He is either an adulterer or a bigamist. Pick one. He claims that Terri told him she did not want to live as a zucchini but there is nothing in writing. The proper thing for him to do would be to divorce Terri, turn responsibility for her care over to her family, and bow out, but, as I said, he is a scumbag.
The same people who are for starving Terri to death are the same people who think sucking out the brains of a half delivered baby is just fine. They also think that killing convicted murderers is wrong. These people are known as liberals and look down upon us stupid rubes in the red states. These are also the people who thought it was right that Elian Gonzales should be returned to his father and thought nothing about the Clinton administration sending in storm troopers to make this happen. The Clinton administration also fried to a crisp the Branch Davidians. But to these people, it is John Ashcroft who is the Nazi. Has he fried any religious wackos or sent in storm troopers to kick in doors and frighten the crap out of a little boy?
Terri's family is living in a dream world known as denial. They are grasping at straws to save the life of Terri. So far they have only found one doctor who thinks Terri can improve. There are nurses who claim that they have been able to feed Terri pudding and broth. There are others who claim that she has responded to questions. I think this is wishful thinking, but then, I think Terri's husband should have bowed out a long time ago. He is a major league douchebag.
The Congress of the United States and the President of the United States have no business getting involved in this matter. On the upside, while they are fucking around with this, they aren't spending more money and fucking us.
I feel for Terri's family. I really do, but they have lost. She's gonna die. Is it right? I don't know. Will she suffer? Some say yes, but others say that the part of her brain that would react to starvation and dehydration isn't working. She will eventually slip into a coma and die.
Terri's "husband", the scumbag, will rejoice because he will finally be free of the albatross around his neck. Liberals will say it's all for the best because, after all, they believe in killing the innocent and protecting the guilty. People will now be more specific in writing living wills.
This may energize the religous conservatives into trying to have the Bush administration appoint more conservative judges. This may even be an election issue in 2006 for the senatorial election races. We'll see.
For Terri's family it is time to move on.
For my readers it is time to excoriate me in the comments. Have at it.
Going back in my stack of pics, I found this one that my long time friend Pat sent me. I'm sure it's Photoshopped, but it's sumpin' I can imagine sailors doing. I just can't imagine a captain or an executive officer allowing it.
Update: Yep! Sho' nuff! It has been confirmed by a reliable source that this picture was Photoshopped. I still like it.
Another update: To those jerkweeds who think that bloggers aren't fact checked, I was informed within one hour by one of my readers that this picture had indeed been Photoshopped. That is not the first time that has happened. It never takes more than a day for someone to fact check my ass, and I usually issue a correction unless the fact checker is French. Then, I usually write a French bashing post.
The new boss got her shit together and brought Chloe back, but, geez, c'mon how could they fall for the tunnel trick? Don't they watch Alias? On Alias the bad guys did almost the same thing when they helped Sidney's mother escape. As soon as I heard, "Tunnel" I knew that was where they were gonna make the switch.
I thought the babe who was making it with the Air Force guy was a fox!
The Mummy is still at large and they haven't called in Brendan and Rachel yet.
As long as I'm talking about stuff like 24, have y'all seen The Italian Job? It's kinda neat when the Mini Coopers go down into the subway station. I've just got one question: How did they get past the turnstyles?
That's all for tonight.
Last night my sister crashed at 9:00 PM. My brother-in-law went down around 10:00. I succumbed at 10:30. We're nothing but a bunch of old pussies. They're both 62. I'm 58.
We were all tired and sore this morning. It's that old age thing again. Ryan was in the best shape. We spent most of the morning cleaning up. Ryan can prune faster than we can bag, so he didn't do much more pruning. We used 20 bags this year, which was the same that we used last year and we're still not done. They're coming back Easter and we're gonna go back to it the next day.
I've got lots of errands to run tomorrow, but if I finish early enough I'll get back up on the berm and finish with the blackberry plants and plant my 24 creeping phlox plants. My sister wouldn't let me finish that on Saturday. She thought I was goofing off (my hands and back tell a different story) and made me come down and help bag.
It's amazing all the crap we got out of my yard, since it's so small. We got 20 bags of trash last year and we got 20 this year. Ryan is unable to get my super bush down to the right size. It seems to grow as it is being cut. I'm gonna have to hire some people to get it down to the size it should be. Hello Mexicans.
I also need to go out and get about 20 bales of pine straw to spread next week.
It's almost time to prepare my raised beds for the veggie garden. Everything goes in around April 15. It will probably be a tad later because I'm going down to what Velociman told the unsuspecting hotel on Jekyll Island was the Georgia Writers' Workshop. Little do they know that this is a collection of Georgia bloggers (and some honorary Georgia bloggers) and should actually be named the Wreckyll in Jekyll. I won't be able to bail early like I did at the last meetup in Helen. And I hope I don't wake up and find a plant in the bathtub the next morning.
Knowing just how much Pumpman adores cats, here's a story that will warm the cockles of his heart.
Link supplied by knitter extraordinaire, Cindy, who knits me a beautiful sweater every year for my birthday.
Yet another one from Richard.
A snail grew tired of his reputation for being slow. He decided to get some fast wheels--a Nissan 350Z. But he insisted that it be changed to a 350S. "S stands for snail," he said. "I want everybody who sees me
roaring past to know who's driving." The dealer complied. Pretty soon, the snail was roaring down the highway. And when people saw him zooming by, they'd say,
"Wow! Look at that S-car go!"
OK. I lied. I'm posting sumpin' else tonight.
My sister and her husband came down from Columbia to do some pruning work here at GOC Central. Day 1 was brutal!
I spent most of the day weeding on my berm and digging up blackberry plants. Farking birds eat blackberries and then shit the seeds out. Bam! Up sprouts a blackberry plant. It's my own damn fault for not addressing the problem last summer. Maybe I oughta just shoot the freaking birds.
I spent the rest of the day helping my sister bag the prunings. We filled up 13 bags today. I'm beat. I'm taking them out to dinner tonight. This is all I'm writing today. Gotta rest up for Day 2.
In honor of St. Patrick's Day, a few days late, this Saturday Joke has an Irish theme. It was sent to me by Jesse.
Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money; between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro.
Murphy said "Hang on, I have an idea."
He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage.
Shamus said "Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all!"
Murphy replied "Don't worry - just follow me."
He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whisky.
Shamus said "Now you've lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven't got any money!!"
Murphy replied, with a smile "Don't worry, I have a plan, Cheers!" They downed their drinks.
Murphy said "OK, I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth."
The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out. They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free.
At the tenth pub Shamus said "Murphy - I don't think I can do any more o'this. I'm drunk and me knees are killin' me!"
Murphy said "How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub."
Today's Saturday Boobage is for all the sailors. It is a simple two point navigational system.
So everything I've been reading about the Brian Nichols fiasco seems to have a lot of the words alleged or allegedly, such as Brian Nichols allegedly shot all those people. Jesus H. Christ! There's no alleged about it. He farking did it! Maybe the stories should read like this.
Allegedly last Friday, Brian Nichols, who was allegedly on his way to an alleged court date for an alleged rape, allegedly overpowered an alleged 51 year old alleged grandmother alleged sheriff's deputy. Nichols then allegedly took the alleged deputy's alleged gun and made his way to an alleged courtroom where he allegedly shot an alleged court reporter and an alleged judge. They are currently allegedly dead and have been allegedly buried.
Then, the alleged Brian Nichols, allegedly made his way out of the alleged court house in alleged Fulton County, but not before he allegedly overpowered another alleged sheriff's deputy where he allegedly took the alleged deputy's alleged gun.
He allegedly carjacked an alleged dump truck and an alleged green alleged Honda which allegedly belonged to an alleged reporter for the alleged Atlanta Urinal and Constipation an alleged newspaper in the alleged city of Atlanta in the alleged state of Georgia, which is of course allegedly in the United States of America on the alleged planet allegedly known as earth in the alleged solar system, in the alleged Milky Way Galaxy in the alleged universe, which some allege was formed by an alleged big bang while allegedly others, especially those in alleged Cobb County, allegedly believe that an alleged deity, allegedly known as God, allegedly created the universe, and said alleged residents of Cobb county allegedly made the alleged school board of the alleged Cobb County put alleged stickers on the alleged science textbooks of the alleged Cobb County alleged school system allegedly saying that alleged evolution was only an alleged theory.
But back to the alleged story.
The alleged Atlanta Police Force allegedly put out an all points bulletin on the alleged green alleged Honda that belonged to the alleged reporter of the alleged newspaper, the alleged Atlanta Urinal and Constipation, because the alleged police force thought that the alleged escapee, allegedly known as Brian Nichols had left the alleged parking garage in the alleged green alleged Honda.
However, the alleged parking attendant at the alleged garage allegedly told the alleged police force that the alleged green alleged Honda allegedly never left the alleged garage and the alleged escapee, allegedly known as Brian Nichols was allegedly on foot and allegedly, the only way he could have allegedly left the alleged garage was through the only alleged exit which the alleged police allegedly didn't bother to guard since they allegedly didn't listen to the alleged parking attendant at the alleged garage.
Meanwhile Brian Nichols, the alleged escapee, allegedly left the alleged parking garage via the alleged exit that the alleged parking attendant told the alleged police force to watch, which they allegedly didn't.
The alleged green alleged Honda was allegedly found allegedly thirteen hours later by an alleged civilian who allegedly worked for the alleged Atlanta Urinal and Constipation allegedly one floor above where it was allegedly carjacked in the alleged parking garage.
Meanwhile, while the alleged police force of the alleged city of Atlanta were on the lookout for the alleged green alleged Honda, the alleged escapee, allegedly known as Brian Nichols, allegedly took MARTA which is an alleged mass transit system in the alleged city of Atlanta.
He allegedly took MARTA to Lennox Square, an alleged shopping mall in the alleged Buckhead area of the alleged city of Atlanta. There he was allegedly spotted by many alleged people who allegedly reported this to the alleged police force of the alleged city of Atlanta. The alleged police force allegedly disregarded these alleged sightings because they were allegedly still on the alleged lookout for the alleged green alleged Honda.
In the meantime, the alleged escapee, allegedly known as Brian Nichols, allegedly shot an alleged Federal Customs agent who was allegedly working on an alleged house that he was allegedly building. He allegedly died and has also allegedly been buried.
The alleged Brian Nichols then allegedly took the alleged Customs Agent's alleged car and allegedly drove to alleged Gwinnett County, which has allegedly refused to allow MARTA, the alleged mass transit system of the alleged city of Atlanta to allegedly expand to the alleged Gwinnett County because that would allegedly allow alleged criminals to allegedly ride MARTA, an alleged mass transit system to the alleged Gwinnett County. Allegedly the alleged Gwinnett County may be allegedly on to something.
The alleged escapee, alledly known as Brian Nichols, allegedly surpised a woman allegedly known as Ashley Smith who had just allegedly returned to her alleged apartment after allegedly going out allegedly at 2:00 AM to allegedly buy a pack of alleged cigarettes. The alleged Brian Nichols allegedly took the alleged Ashley Smith hostage.
The alleged hostage, allegedly known as Ashley Smith read to the alleged escapee, allegedly known as Brian Nichols, from an alleged inspirational book that she had allegedly been reading. She also allegedly fixed him some alleged pancakes. She allegedly calmed down the alleged escapee, allegedly known as Brian Nichols and he allegedly eventually let her go so she could allegedly call 911. The alleged police force of the alleged Gwinnett County then allegedly arrested the alleged escapee who was allegedly known as Brian Nichols.
Myron Freeman, the alleged Sheriff (This is where alleged really applies!) of alleged Fulton County says mistakes were allegedly made and alleged procedures will be definitely allegedly reviewed.
Richard Pennington the alleged (Once again, alleged applies.)Chief of the alleged Atlanta Police Force was allegedly reviewing the entire alleged fiasco to allegedly see where alleged improvements could allegedly be made. Shirley Franklin, the alleged mayor of the alleged city of Atlanta has yet to allegedly weigh in on the alleged fiasco.
I may have allegedly misspelled alleged or allegedly when I allegedly wrote this post but that would obviously be alleged carelessness on my part or an alleged lack of allegedly doing a good job of alleged proofreading. Anyway it is allegedly late and I have to allegedly get to my alleged bed for an alleged good night's sleep.
An allegedly good night to all of my alleged readers.
People who go to the University of Texas like to tell jokes about Texas A&M. They are known as Aggie jokes. This needs to be sent to Neal Boortz, since he is an Aggie. This one was sent to me by Charlieb.
Dr. Calvin Rickson, a scientist from Texas A&M University has invented a bra that keeps women's breasts from jiggling and prevents the nipples from pushing through the fabric when cold weather sets in.
After announcing the invention at a news conference, a large group of men took Dr. Rickson outside and kicked the shit out of him.
I've added two blogs to my blogroll. This guy mainly because of this post which should really piss off ol' douchebag douchebag. And the nice thing is, he posts in both French and English. Here is the French version for douchebag douchebag and his friends. If douchebag douchebag sends him some hate mail he can do it in French.
The other blog is this one. He has linked to me for quite some time. It is written in Italian so if you don't read that language you will need to use a web translation program. I can read a little Italian so sometimes I don't need the translator.
I dislike the French. I like Italians. I like Italy. If I had to live in one European city it would be Rome. I've been there twice on Italian tours, and I've passed through it a few times and just spent the night. The food! The people! The history!
I Love it all. And the Italians don't dislike Americans like the French do.
These are pictures from Iraq that the Lamestream Media will not show. They were sent to me by Catfish.
My nephew, the WH (War Hero) who is just back from a tour of duty in Iraq, tells me that most of the Iraqis he dealt with loved Americans.
By the way, what has France done for the world lately?
Update: My little French troll deposited more troll droppings in the comments, but he was unable to answer the question: What has France done for the world lately?
One of my commenters, Jimmy, suggested that something be done about Wal-Mart and how it is destroying towns. Hopefully, he will put his solution in the comments section of this post.
I think he may believe it to be some sort of monopoly and the gummint should file a lawsuit against it like it did to IBM in the 60's and just recently, Microsoft.
In the waning days of the Johnson Administration, the Justice Department filed an anti-trust suit against IBM. Thomas Watson Jr., the CEO at that time, felt like he had been stabbed in the back since he was a Dimocrat. Remember what Ann Coulter once said and I paraphrase, Republicans and Dimocrats both run as conservatives but Republicans sometimes doublecross the voters, Dimocrats always do.
What the gummint didn't like was IBM's practice of bundling. What IBM did was offer a total package to its customers for a price. For one set price, the customer would get hardware, software, hardware support, and software support. The gummint didn't like this because it stifled competition. What they wanted IBM to do was price hardware, software, hardware support, and software support separately so other vendors could compete. For example, STK could compete on tape drives. EMC could compete on DASD. Other vendors could compete on printers. Software vendors could compete with their products. That is what happened and it gave rise to "plug compatible" hardware and competing software products like Omegamon (Kicks the shit out of RMF).
Some customers liked that and other customers didn't. Some customers didn't even want to manage their I/T infrastructure which led to the rise of outsourcing. With outsourcing, the customer would pay a set price for a range of I/T services. This would include hardware, software, hardware support, programming, and software support. This is how Ross Perot made his millions after leaving IBM and creating EDS. Deja vu all over again.
So now we come to Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart started out by building stores where nobody else wanted to: in the middle of nowhere. People out in the country had to drive to the suburbs or cities to shop at a Sears, Kmart, or Target. By building Wal-Marts out in the country, Sam Walton tapped into a market of country people. You know who I mean: all those dumb red state folks.
Jimmy commented on my Sarah Brady post:
I thought that it would be the conservatives in the red states that have had their home town turned into a ghost town by wal-mart that are angered the most by their practices.Don't you red-staters care about each other?
So Jimmy is contending that building Wal-Marts out in the middle of nowhere turned red state towns into ghost towns. I used to drive I-44 in Missouri and I remember when the Wal-Mart appeared in the middle of nowhere. There wasn't a big city around. The small towns weren't much to talk about either. The Wal-Mart is still there. So are the small towns and they're still not much to talk about. If they're ghost towns now, they were ghost towns then and Wal-Mart had nothing to do with it.
As usual, I'm having a little fun with Jimmy and I think I know that that isn't what he means, but he is still wrong in his contention.
With the success Wal-Mart had with building stores in the middle of nowhere for us poor red state people to shop, Wal-Mart decided it could move to the cities and compete with Kmart, Target, and Sears and compete it did. The Wal-Mart near my sister in South Carolina is right across the street from a Kmart. Take a guess as to which store's parking lot was full and which store's parking lot was empty.
We actually have a Wal-Mart in beautiful Dunwoody. Beautiful Dunwoody is far from a ghost town. It is an upscale suburb of Atlanta. Inside, all the signs are written in English and Spanish. After all, we need to have a place for the oppressed Mexicans to shop. Y'know all those illegals who clean our houses and mow our lawns. What would we do without them? They also build our houses and do renovations and additions. Mexicans love to shop at Wal-Mart.
What I think Jimmy might be talking about (I'm not sure since I don't know how Wal-Mart can create ghost towns.) is when a Wal-Mart outgrows one of its stores and builds a bigger one, or a super center, nearby and abondons the old site. This leaves an empty box store but I hardly think that can be called a ghost town. That didn't happen when they did that in Acworth Georgia where I used to live. The old Wal-Mart store is now a furniture store and Acworth is still not a ghost town.
Wal-Mart is successful because it sells stuff that people want and it sells it cheap. Our Mexicans want cheap stuff and they can get it at the beautiful Dunwoody Wal-Mart. So can us eeevvvill rich folks and the red state rubes who have made enough money to move to beautiful Dunwoody. We like to save money also and that's why we shop at Wal-Mart. But, we also shop at Nordstroms, Macys and Bloomingdales.
I sure hope Jimmy is wrong and beautiful Dunwoody doesn't turn into a ghost town. That would haunt me for the rest of my life.
From Addison.
Neither will the French. Think about an aircraft carrier that doesn't leave port and an airport building that collapses. BWAHAHAHAHA!
My old Navy buddy Pres sent this to me. And remember, the only difference between a fairy tale and a sea story is that the fairy tale starts off "Once upon a time...". The sea story starts off, "This ain't no shit...".
Here's a picture of the USS Abraham Lincoln CVN72
being maneuvered into Pearl Harbor en route to
their home port in Everett Washington. They were met by a number of wives & relatives after their extended tour in the Gulf...
The aircraft carrier U.S.S. Abraham Lincoln was finally inching up to the pier at Pearl Harbor when the Captain of the ship noticed a sailor on the flight deck gesturing wildly with semaphore flags. He then noticed an attractive young woman standing on top of a station wagon, also waving semaphore flags.
Always concerned about security and never having seen
something like this, the Captain barked at his Bridge
Signalman, "What message are those two people sending?"
The Signalman concentrated intently and soon reported,
"Sir, he is sending FOXTROT-FOXTROT and she is sending
ECHO-FOXTROT."
Not having any clue as to what these messages could mean, the Captain dispatched an armed Marine to escort the sailor back to the Bridge.
The sailor arrived, out of breath from running up the many ladders to the bridge, and saluted smartly.
"Seaman Endicott reporting as ordered, sir!"
"Seaman", shouted the Captain, "Who is that woman on the pier and why are you exchanging signals FF and EF?"
"Sir, that's my wife, Sir, and she wants to eat first!"
Jon sent me these fun facts about the French.
From Airboss.
Update: Thanks to Dar (and others) who sent me this link showing Rummy in action.
Yep! I ate some chicken tonight along with fettucine al fredo and some fried corn. In honor of douchebag douchebag I opened a bottle of beaujolais. Just trying to help the French economy which needs all the help it can get.
Liberal commenter, Jimmy posted the following on my Health Care post.
I find it odd that you compare the US and France so subjectively. Our perspectives on unemployment, employment, and health care, standards of living...all different. To say one is better than the other...a little absurd.Does money make us better? Does being overworked help us? As you've said, we're now a country of unhealthy, overweight, violent, workaholics. And the benefits are? Oh, that's right...good medical care and money. Well, if our culture wasn't what it is, perhaps we wouldn't need it. I'd give up out fantastic medical care or our luxeries for mediocre if 2/3 of all the young women I met were attractive.
Wouldn't it be a better comparison to gauge the happiness of each population?
So living in France, amongst a bunch of dirty, stinking. backstabbing, ungrateful cowards would make you happier?
My reply:
Jimmy - Are you unhappy? I'm not. I'm very happy as are most of my rich friends who spent all of our lives exploiting poor people. BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Of course I'm subjective. I see the world through my own lens. Where would you like to live? Here, or France? If it's France, why are you still here? What is the number one country in the world that people want to emigrate to? Is it France or the United States? Hint. It's not France.We have the strongest economy. We are still the land of opportunity. We're still on the rise. France is on the decline. Their social welfare state is imploding. Ours will too if we cannot figger out how to address Medicare and Social Security.
His response:
People emigrate to money, and the US is where it's at. It doesn't mean living in the US makes for a happier existence.I stayed in Montpellier for a little while. It was nice. I'd live in France if I could get a decent paying job to sponsor me for a work visa. There are probably other places I'd go first, but, yeah...France seemed alright to me. I wouldn't mind a year or two, there.
Shall I bring up the Maslov hierarchy of needs that I learned in my sociology class? Y'know, all that food, shelter, and protection stuff. People migrate to the United States because we are the land of opportunity. To many people money means happiness. It sure means happiness to me.
Working 31.5 years at IBM allowed me to live the good life. Along the way I was able to oppress widows and orphans while investing my money to become one of the eeeevil rich. I have enough money that I could probably live anywhere in the world. I own two BMW's (German company douchbag douchbag. You know. The country you surrendered to in WWII.) and a Toyota pickup. I also live in a 2500 square foot house. Can you match that buttmunch buttmunch? Throughout the world you hear about the American Dream. You never hear about the French Dream.
Since according to Jimmy, I guess, money does not buy happiness, I asked him why he didn't just move to France and take a low paying job. If money does not buy happiness, and he is not happy here, why is he here? Why not take a subsistence job in France?
His reply:
I'm sure there's a lot of places I could go and just barely get by. And, if I were unskilled, that would seem like a great option.However, until I can speak another language fluently, I can do the most good here, with a higher paying job. After all, power is the ability to choose the redistribution of wealth. I will not abandon my responsibility for happiness.
So, until I'm bilingual, it looks like you're stuck with me.
Did you notice that "redisribution of wealth"? Spoken like a true communist. Jimmy, you're in the wrong country. You belong in France. And look. He says he is not happy. Why not learn Spanish and go to Cuba. They have "free" health care and could use your skills.
I guess Jimmy is just another unhappy liberal who is unhappy living in the United States but for some reason (in this case not being bilingual) doesn't want to leave.
Jimmy, fucktard fucktard would love to have you in France. Maybe you could stay with him until you learned French.
Delta is ready when you are.
Andy wrote:
Haven't heard much from anyone about the new 'attack' submarine...the USS Jimmy Carter. I can't believe everybody has let this one go by without some serious jabs.
Being an ex-Navy guy myself, I was gonna let it go because I really feel sorry for the poor guys who have to serve on that boat. In the Navy, many ships and boats get nicknames. The battleship Missouri was known as the Mighty Mo. The aircraft carrier Enterprise was known as the Big E. What is the Jimmy Carter gonna be known as? The Peanut? The Attack Rabbit?
Looks like it's gonna be worse than I thought. Charlieb sent me this:
In February, the US Navy placed the nuclear-powered attack submarine USS Jimmy Carter (SSN-23) in commission. Jimmy Carter is the latest and last of the Seawolf-class attack submarines.During construction, Jimmy Carter received extensive modifications by General Dynamics Electric Boat in order to conduct 'special missions', meaning classified hush-hush operations that we'll never hear about. The kind of modifications that were done to the boat is also classified, but as is often the case, some enterprising photographer managed to get a picture of the boat.
Kim du Toit wrote that today is Eat An Animal For PETA Day. I'm gonna do my part by having some chicken. It's probably chicken that was tortured by being kept in pens and force fed food. It was probably injected with growth hormones also. BWAHAAHAHAHA!
Bane beat me to it in the comments on last week's post but he said what I was thinking.
Who thinks that a woman can run CTU? The newest one fucked up right off the bat when she fired the only fox on the show. Sarah is a babe and I'll miss her. The only time the Secdef's daughter looked good was on the first episode when she was in her bra. What Jack sees in that anorexic bitch is beyond me.
Geez! CTU is shorthanded and they get rid of another person? This place has worse management than IBM.
Then Tony's ex won't even listen to him when he tells her what Jack is gonna do.
Fire that bitch, put Tony in charge, and bring back Sarah and Chloe.
And, yes, whatever happened to the Secdef's son?
I was gonna write a post on how incredibly stupid the Atlanta Police Department and Fulton Count Sheriff's Department are, but Boortz does a better job.
We had a man who played linebacker in college escorted by a petite 51 year old female deputy.
The deputy was overpowered in front of a monitored security camera. It was caught on tape. Evidently the people who were supposed to be watching the monitors had better things to do.
The car the police were looking for was found 13 hours later in the same garage by a civilian!
The fugitive took MARTA (Atlanta's rapid rail system) to Lennox Mall. I guess it is, as Marta's slogan states, "SMARTA to use MARTA". While the fugitive was on MARTA the cops were still looking for the Green Honda that was still in the same parking garage.
I'm glad that I don't live in Fulton County or the city of Atlanta.
Have I said lately how much France sucks? It's a country of lazy, smelly, cowardly, backstabbers.
What has France done for us?
1. Helped us in the Revolutionary War.
2. Gave us the Statue of Liberty.
I know this because every time I write a French bashing post some asshole French person points this shit out to me as if I didn't know it. I know it assholes. You have done exactly two things for us: Gave us support when we were fighting one of your enemies and built us a fucking statue. BFD!
What have we done for France?
1. Helped win WWI.
2. Won WWII and freed them from the Germans. They could have stopped Hitler earlier but were pussies and thought appeasement would work, just like they think that appeasing terrorists works. Their stupid Maginot Line was about as effective as their aircraft carrier that never leaves port. We have those too. We call them airports.
3. Rebuilt their country after WWII with American tax money. That is money we never saw again.
4. Protected them in the Cold War. They provided no military support and no bases. They contributed no money or troops for their own protection.
5. Saved the French wine industry when the vinyards were being ravished with Phylloxera by sending them grape vine cuttings from Missouri that were resistant. See link.
The gratitude of French grape growers was so great that they erected two monuments in the city of Montpelier in the south of France, honoring the Missouri grape growers who were credited with saving the French wine industry.
How soon they forget.
Looks like we've done more for them than they have for us.
When Reagan was president, they would not give us overflight privileges when we bombed Libya thus forcing us to extend the flights and perform midair refueling.
They actively opposed us in the runup to the Iraq War.
Someday, when France is once again in trouble, they'll come asking for our assistance and we'll be stupid enough to give it to them. Y'see we can be counted upon to help other nations. France can be counted upon to stab their friends in the back.
We just fought two wars to free over 50 million people. What has France done for the world lately?
Nothing.
As usual.
Yet another Monday Pun from Richard.
In the 1950s, Nicholai was a criminal living in Prague. Before long,
the police were on his trail. Nicholai fled to Budapest, where he hid
in the home of his cousin, Josef. That didn't work; the police soon
found him. They arrested both men. Nicholai was charged with his crimes
in Prague. And Josef was charged with ...
caching a bad Czech!
In debates in comments of various posts, I challenged our latest French troll, who said he was leaving this site and never coming back (I guess his village called and wanted its idiot back) to provide links for his contentions. To his credit, he did.
To prove that France was superior to the United States (BWAHAHAHAHA!) at least in the area of health care (Remember this is the country where a bunch of old people died of heat stroke while in hospitals and nursing homes in 2003. On the other hand, 2003 was a very good year for French Bordeaux. A twofer.) he provided this link.
Now I'll admit, I was taken aback here. The United States ranks behind Canada and France? How could this be? After all, Bill Clinton, who could have gone anywhere in the world last year to have a quadruple bypass, chose to stay in the United States. Why didn't he go to France or Canada?
Christopher Reeve could have afforded to have had his medical needs taken care of anywhere in the world. Why did he choose to stay in the United States?
And why do Canadians routinely cross the borders into the United States for routine tests and treatments, therefore eschewing the 29th best health care system in the world? That one is easy. As in most countries where health care is "free", services are rationed and there are long waiting lists.
The answers to these questions are easy. The United States has the best doctors, the best hospitals and the best medical schools in the world.
But, I hear you exclaim, why is the United States ranked 37th in the world? Because the data used for the ratings only takes into account one thing: life expectancy. That is not a valid measurement of a health care system.
Now if my little French troll had said that Americans were fat, I would have agreed with him. I, myself, am fifteen pounds overweight. That's why I have been pissed off about being sick. I have not been able to get to the gym and start working out again.
We have a fat epidemic in this country. Being overweight leads to heart problems, high blood pressure, diabetes, and other complications. You can have the best health care system in the world (as we do) but if you don't take care of yourself, your life expectancy will drop.
Our hectic lifestyle has led to eating too much fast food and not getting enough exercise. Our children spend too much time playing video games when they should be out exercising.
He was also nice enough to give a link to another site that was supposed to provide proof that France has a better economy than the Unites States. Here are the figures that count.
Per capita GDP (in USD, adjusted for PPP)2002 France: 27,300 USA: 36,200
Average annual growth rate in real GDP (since 1990)2002 France: 1.8 USA: 3.0
Inflation rateFrance: 2.2 USA: 2.3
The French would love to have our GDP and growth rate. Our unemployment rate is half of theirs. They tout their 35 hour work week and other lavish benefits, but that is the trade off that has led to their high unemployment. French workers (and Germans) cost more than United States workers. Once hired, they are next to impossible to fire, so French companies try to run with the bare minimum of employees.
As an aside, isn't it neat that the French transport workers are striking at the same time the International Olympic Committee is in Paris checking out whether Paris should host the 2012 Olympics?
Another factor in our life expectency is how hard we work. Look at our per capita GDP compared to France. We work harder and we are more productive. Hard work can lead to stress which can cause health problems. That is the price we pay for having the number one economy in the world.
I'm sure our love affair with the automobile and the fatalities associated with driving figure in there also.
Last, but not least, we have the inner city casualties associated with our insane War on Drugs. These are mostly casualties among black men. Take out those numbers and our life expectancy figures go much higher.
I am a T12/L1 paraplegic and I receive excellent care. After back surgery, I rehabbed at Shepherd Center. a world class facility in dealing with spinal cord injuries. Not only does Shepherd do physical therapy, they also do therapeutic recreation. My ski and dive trips were both Shepherd events.
With the long waiting lists in Canada (and I expect France and Germany) I am happy with the timely and reponsive care I get here in the United States.
As I said in the beginning, Bill Clinton could have afforded heart surgery any where in the world. He didn't choose France. He didn't choose Canada. He chose the United States.
He knew where the best health care was.
Here I am in front of a statue of two dolphins at Cayman Brac.
Here I am at Divi Tiara on Cayman Brac after a day of diving.
Sorry this is late.
This is my kind of playground.
I'm away from my PC and don't have access to any pictures so I'm gonna post sumpin' that was sent to me and written by a Brit who gets it. Thanks to Tom.
I was gonna post this Friday, but my nephew Reid, the WH (War Hero) blew the power supply on the PC Thursday night. He was IM'ing like crazy and downloading CD's onto his IPOD. The PC didn't come back until yesterday afternoon. We went out to dinner and he hogged it after we got back. I didn't kick him off because I support the troops.
What have the Americans ever done for us? Liberated 50 million people...
Gerard Baker
ONE OF MY favourite cinematic moments is the scene in Monty Python's
Life of Brian when Reg, aka John Cleese, the leader of the People's
Front of Judea, is trying to whip up anti-Roman sentiment among his
team of slightly hesitant commandos.
"What have the Romans ever done for us?" he asks.
"Well, there's the aqueduct," somebody says, thoughtfully. "The
sanitation," says another. "Public order," offers a third. Reg
reluctantly acknowledges that there may have been a couple of
benefits. But then steadily, and with increasing enthusiasm, his men
reel off a litany of the good things the Romans have wrought with
their occupation of the Holy Land.
By the time they're finished they're not so sure about the whole
insurgency idea after all and an exasperated Reg tries to rally them:
"All right, but apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education,
wine, public order, irrigation, roads, a fresh water system, and
public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?"
I can't help but think of that scene as I watch the contortions of the
anti-American hordes in Britain, Europe and even in the US itself in
response to the remarkable events that are unfolding in the real
Middle East today.
Little more than three years after US forces, backed by their faithful
British allies, set foot in Afghanistan, the entire historical dynamic
of this blighted region has already shifted.
Ignoring, fortunately, the assault from clever world opinion on
America's motives, its credibility and its ambitions, the Bush
Administration set out not only to eliminate immediate threats but
also to remake the Middle East. In the last month, the pace of
progress has accelerated, and from Beirut to Kabul.
Confronted with this awkward turn of events, Reg's angry successors
are asking their cohorts: "What have the Americans ever done for us?"
"Well, they did get rid of the Taleban in Afghanistan. 'Orrible bunch,
they were."
"All right, the Taleban, I grant you."
"Then there was Iraq. Knocked off one of the nastiest dictators who
ever lived and gave the whole nation a chance to pick its own rulers."
"Yeah, all right. Fair enough. I didn't like Saddam."
"Libya gave up its nuclear weapons."
"And then there's Syria. Thousands of people on the streets of
Lebanon. Syrians look like they're pulling out."
"I just heard Egypt's going to hold free presidential elections for
the first time. And Saudi Arabia just held elections too."
"The Palestinians and the Israelis are talking again and they say
there's a real chance of peace this time."
"All right, all right. But apart from liberating 50 million people in
Iraq and Afghanistan, undermining dictatorships throughout the Arab
world, spreading freedom and self-determination in the broader Middle
East and moving the Palestinians and the Israelis towards a real
chance of ending their centuries-long war, what have the Americans
ever done for us?"
It's too early, in fairness, to claim complete victory in the
American-led struggle to bring peace through democratic transformation
of the region. Despite the temptation to crow, we must remember that
this is not Berlin 1989. There will surely be challenging times ahead
in Iraq, Iran, in the West Bank and elsewhere. The enemies of
democratic revolution — all the terrorists and Baathists, the sheikhs,
the mullahs and the monarchs — are not going to give up without a
fight.
But something very important is happening now, something that will be
very hard to stop. And, although not all of it can be directly
attributed to the US strategy in the region, can anyone seriously
argue that it would have happened without it? Neither is it true, as
some have tried to argue, that all of this is merely some unintended
consequence of an immoral and misconceived war in Iraq.
It was always the express goal of the Bush Administration to change
the regime in Baghdad, precisely because of the opportunities for
democracy it would open up in the rest of the Arab world. George Bush
understands the simple but historically demonstrable thesis that
freedom is not only the most basic of human rights, but also the best
way to ensure that nations do not go to war with each other.
In a speech one month before the start of the Iraq war in 2003, Mr
Bush laid out the strategy: "The world has a clear interest in the
spread of democratic values, because stable and free nations do not
breed the ideologies of murder. They encourage the peaceful pursuit of
a better life."
I doubt that anybody, even the most prescient in the Bush
Administration or at 10 Downing Street, thought the progress we are
now seeing would come as quickly as it has.
But what was clear to the bold foreign policy strategists in
Washington was that the status quo that existed before September 11
could no longer be tolerated. Much of the Muslim world represented
decay and stagnation, and bred anger and resentment. That was the root
cause of the terrorism that had attacked America with increasing
ferocity between 1969 and 2001.
America's critics craved stability in the Middle East. Don't rock the
boat, they said. But to the US this stability was that of the mass
grave; the calm was the eerie quiet that precedes the detonation of
the suicide bomb. The boat was holed and listing viciously.
As a foreign policy thinker close to the Administration put it to me,
in the weeks before the Iraq war two years ago: "Shake it and see.
That's what we are going to do." The US couldn't be certain of the
outcome, but it could be sure that whatever happened would be better
than the status quo.
And so America, the revolutionary power, plunged in and shook the
region to its foundations. And it is already liking what it sees.
gerard.baker@thetimes.co.uk
By the way, what has France done lately, other than obstruct us in the War On Terror?
I got up to South Carolina about 10:30 AM. Ryan, my brother-in-law, and my nephew, Reid, were out looking for another gun for Reid. No matter how many he has, it's not enough. I wonder if he might be related to Kim du Toit or Airboss.
They got back at 11:30 and it was off to the range. In this case, the range happens to be 160 acres of forested land that belongs to Ryan's mother. We drove down by the pond.
The inventory:
Reid's stuff:
Ruger mini 30
Glock 21
S & W 329 PD
Ryan's stuff:
Mossburg 12 guage
Rossi 357
Glock 21
Mine:
S & W 640
Ammo shot:
12 guage 45 target rounds no. 6 shot
45 ACP - 120 rounds
44 mag 72 rounds
78.62 80 rounds
38 50 rounds
357 mag 15 rounds
I feel so inadequate with just my 640. I should have brought my Mauser. Yep! A gen-u-wine WWII German Mauser. Next trip I will. I only shot 60 rounds through my 640. Airboss is right. I need to have the barrel ported to shoot .357 rounds. Whoa! Do they kick ass compared to the .38 rounds. I'll also need to spend a lot of time at the range. I hope my buddy Richard knows of one closer than Georgia Range and Guns.
Reid was letting go with the Mossburg when he said, "This is awesome! Whatever pisses Sarah Brady off is fine with me." I agree. The lad can shoot with both handguns and rifles. Kim and Airboss would be impressed. The gummint training has paid off.
Ryan told me the cheapest place he has found to buy ammo is Wall Mart. Great! I can get cheap ammo and piss off liberals by shooping at Wall Mart. It's a twofer.
We may buy some more ammo and go shooting again tomorrow. Hey Sarah! Bite me!
Geez! I had to deal with another booger eatin' moh-ron troll who accused me of not being fair. I wish these assholes would read The Rules. This site is not a democracy. It is not fair. I pay for the web space. I pay for the bandwidth. If you have problems with that, start your own web site.
My opinions are almost always right. Why? Because I say so. My site. My rules.
If I say a comment thread is finished. It is finished. My site. My rules.
I enforce Godwin's Law. If you call someone a Nazi, you lose the argument. My site. My rules.
If you're gonna insult me try to make it original and amusing. You sure are stupid is lame. If you amuse me I'll let you stay. I run this site for my amusement and pleasure not for incredibly stupid trolls.
If you call me a bible thumper it shows that you are an idiot since I have stated many times on this site that I am an atheist. Read my stuff before making stupid assumptions about my beliefs. Better yet, read the FAQ.
France sucks! That's not an opinion. That's a fact. Why? Because I say so. My site. My rules.
If you think France has a better economy than the United States prove it with links to back it up. I have some awesome fact checkers who read this site.
France had a 4th quarter 2004 growth rate of .8%. that might be good for France but for the United States that would suck. Where did I get that? Google France GDP. France has an unemployment rate of close to 10%. The United States' unemployment rate is 5.4%. Which economy is better?
I've traveled all over the world. We drink bottled water here because we want to, not because we have to. Everywhere in this country, tap water is safe to drink. Not so in much of Europe.
We bathe regularly in the United States unlike some people in a country that starts with the letter F.
Our aircraft carriers can leave port.
We actually win wars.
Surrender is a French word. from Old French surrendre : sur-, sur- + rendre, to deliver; see render.]
Now I'm tired. I have to pack so I can get an early start tomorrow. I'm driving up to South Carolina to go shooting with my nephew, who is on leave, and his father. His unit just left Iraq and is back in Germany.
By the way, France sucks and is populated by a bunch of pussies. That is not an opinion. That is a fact.
It's always nice to open up the Opinion section of the Atlanta Urinal and Constipation and see a good old fashioned rant against the President. Nothing like a good old fashioned leftwing screed like this one by Eugene Robinson. Ya see, Eugene doesn't think Bush likes black people. Go figger.
I have to assume that President Bush's sudden concern for my life expectancy, and that of my homies, is just breathtaking political cynicism, nothing more. He isn't sincere. If he were, it would mean a road-to-Damascus transformation as profound as his earlier conversion from jejune, fun-loving frat boy to sober, responsible man of God.
Now what is Eugene talking about?
Here's what he said in January, pitching his dodgy private Social Security accounts at a forum: "African-American males die sooner than other males do, which means the system is inherently unfair to a certain group of people. And that needs to be fixed."
Now that is true. The biggest winners in Social Security are old white women since they live the longest. The biggest losers are black males because they have the shortest life expectancy. I don't know exactly where that leaves Michael Jackson since he used to be a black male and now appears to be a white female. But to Eugene, naturally, It's all Bushhitler The Chimp's fault that black males have short lives.
Like I said, it takes your breath away. An administration that claims to be colorblind, that has been consistently hostile to affirmative action, that deals with black America mainly by inviting some preachers to the White House every now and then to toss them a few faith-based dollars --- an administration that denies race any importance --- has suddenly identified a blatant racial injustice and is determined to right it?
Yep! Oh, by the way, which racist administration appointed the first black secretary of state? Which racist administration appointed the first black female national security advisor? Which racist administration appointed the first black female secretary of state?
What this would mean, if Bush were serious, is that he now accepts race as an objective, quantifiable factor in American life. Not only that: It would also mean that to measure the impact of race, he is using not "opportunity" --- the Republican mantra --- but "outcome," which is doctrinal heresy. The grave, after all, qualifies as the ultimate outcome.
No Eugene. This has nothing to do with outcome. This has everything to do with the "fairness" bullshit that you liberals keep spouting. Is it fair for someone to contribute to a program all of his life and have nothing to show for it because he died before he could collect it? With private accounts, at least his descendants would get some money.
Now Eugene goes on to rant about how there are more black men on death row than there are white men. Of course, this has nothing to do with the fact that black men commit more crimes than whites. What's sad is most of the crime is black on black crime.
Then he has to bring up health care as regards the black community.
So let's fix it, Mr. President. According to health statistics your administration published last year, one big factor is that infant and neonatal mortality rates for black Americans are nearly three times those for whites. A lot of black baby boys never make it out of the hospital. Let's start with that.
OK. Sounds good. Why do you think that is?
Why would infant mortality in black America be nearly twice as high as in impoverished, repressed Cuba, to cite one comparison? For one thing, the mothers of those doomed black baby boys are twice as likely to be teenagers as the mothers of white baby boys, and those too-young black mothers are twice as likely to have had no prenatal care. Blacks are less likely than whites to have health insurance and more likely to use hospital emergency rooms as their primary source of physician care.
I call bullshit on Cuba! Those numbers are cooked. And let's reread one telling sentence in the previous paragraph: For one thing, the mothers of those doomed black baby boys are twice as likely to be teenagers as the mothers of white baby boys, and those too-young black mothers are twice as likely to have had no prenatal care.
Babies having babies. I've written about that before. Is it Bush's fault that black mothers are twice as likely to be teenagers as white mothers?
He continues..
Please, no lectures about personal responsibility and choice. That was the old you.
But. That. Is. The. Whole. Farking. Problem!!!!! That is why there are twice as many black teenage mothers than white teenage mothers. Lack of personal resonsibility and choice. That is not the fault of the Bush Administration. That is the fault of black leaders like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton who prefer to blame rich white Republicans for the problems in the black community rather than preaching personal responsibility and choice.
Black men 15 to 24 are eight times more likely to be murdered than white men that age. Fix it, please.
I can fix it. Wanna know how?
1. Find black leaders who will preach personal responsibility. Send Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, and the rest of the RWPP (Race Warlord Poverty Pimps) packing.
2. Change the culture of black children that thinks getting an education and doing well in school is "acting white".
3. Stay in school and get an education and learn how to read, white, and speak English. Ebonics is not a language.
4. Here's the drastic one. Any woman, black or white (I'm looking to fix all poverty here) who goes on welfare gets sterilized. Yeah, like that's gonna happen. Someone who cannot afford one child should not be having even more children that they cannot afford. Having children and expecting me to support them is not a right.
Eugene then goes on to explain that poverty is the problem. No shit! we've thrown over $5 trillion trying to solve poverty in this country and we still have it. Why? Because giving poor people money will not solve poverty. If it did, we'd have no poverty today.
The way you solve poverty is to teach poor people how to work. You can't get a good job if you drop out of school. You can't get a good job if you can't read and write English. Don't get me started on bilingual education.
The liberals have destroyed the gummint schools by turning them into socialist indoctrination centers. Their misguided welfare problems have created a permanant underclass. If the KKK wanted to fuck up blacks they could not have done a better job than the liberals have. Robert Kleagle Byrd probably chuckles about this on a daily basis.
Eugene keeps on rambling on with the typical liberal bullshit, but I cannot read anymore. He doesn't realize that he is part of the problem, especially when he says "Please, no lectures about personal responsibility and choice." That is the solution but he is too blind to see it.
Dear Airboss,
Mission accomplished. I am now the proud owner of a S & W 640 .357. Glad Georgia is one of those states with a quick background check. Got both .38 (for some practice shooting later this week in South Carolina) and .357 (for gun's real use, namely, protecting my crippled ass.) ammunition.
I should be able to start on my concealed carry permit next week. Also, the dude at the gunshop said that going through an NFA purchase is not that much different from getting a concealed carry permit, just takes longer and is more expensive.
So now all you have to bug me about is my home protection weapon.
You done good.
Since tonight's original post was short (still not completely up to snuff), here's a joke from Catfish.
A tourist walked into a curio shop in San Francisco. Looking around at the exotica, he noticed a very lifelike, life-sized bronze statue of a rat. It had no price tag, but it was so striking he decided he must have it. He took it to the counter. "How much for the bronze rat?"
"Twelve dollars for the rat, one hundred dollars for the story," the owner said.
The tourist gave the shop owner twelve dollars. "I'll take the rat. You can keep the story."
As he walked down the street carrying the rat, he soon noticed that a few real rats had crawled out of the alleys and sewers and began following him. This was disconcerting, so he began walking faster. But within a couple of blocks, the herd of rats behind him had grown to hundreds, and they began squealing. He began to trot toward the Bay, but looking back he saw that the rats now numbered in the millions, were squealing ever louder, and coming toward him faster and faster. Now scared, he broke into a run, then a full Olympic sprint to the edge of the Bay where he threw the bronze rat as far out as he could muster.
Amazingly, the millions of rats all jumped into the Bay after the bronze rat, and they all drowned.
The man walked back to the curio shop.
"Aha!" said the owner. "You have come back for the story."
"No," said the man, "I came back to see if you have a bronze Democrat".
All Right. I'll admit it. I got hooked on 24 this season. Here are my thoughts so far.
They finally relieved Erin Driscoll. That was long overdue. Didn't she read the script? Didn't she know that Jack was the hero? She spent the first four hours getting in Jack's way, and then she arrested CTU's best programmer, Cloe. Then she didn't listen to the black guy when he said the black chick (who turned out to be on the side of the bad guys) couldn't be trusted. To top it off, she brought her psycho daughter to CTU's clinic where she offed herself. Her daughter should have been shot full of drugs and put in a loony bin where she belonged. Good riddance to bad management. I felt like I was watching IBM in action.
BTW, what ever happened to the Secretary of Defense's son?
Do y'all recognize the bad guy? It's the freaking Mummy! How the hell are they gonna defeat this guy without Brendan Frazier and Rachel Weisz?
Another blogger, who shall remain nameless, pointed out that the President has been flying for a long time. Where the hell is he flying to?
I see from the previews that they're bringing in another female manager of CTU. I sure hope that she's better than Driscoll. I'm afraid she may be another "diversity hire". Now that Driscoll's gone, bring Cloe back! She's CTU's best programmer.
The babe who plays Sarah is a fox! I'm in lust! Soneone tell me who she is and if there is stuff on the web about her.
So what do we have? Eleven more episodes? And another female manager coming in? Is she gonna listen to Jack? Has she read the script? Does she know that Jack is always right? Is the President's plane gonna land? Am I gonna continue to lust after Sarah?
While posing these questions, I realized that we are halfway through the current decade and we still haven't come up with a proper name. Is it the nils? Howza 'bout the zeros? Maybe the oughts?
As you can tell, I'm feeling better. I'm still not back to normal, but I'm getting there.
Once again, I turn to Richard for today's Monday pun.
We know Columbus believed the world was round when others believed it was flat. And, of course, we know that he landed in the Americas in 1492. What we have not known, until recently, were his first words
on returning to Spain. However, scholars have recently discovered documents that throw light on the subject. According to one, Columbus'first words on stepping ashore were,
"I'll bet I'm the first man who ever got 8,000 miles on a galleon!"
Airboss sent me this. Get mad at him. I'm just the messenger.
Every Sunday morning I lay in bed drinking coffee and reading the Atlanta Urinal and Constipation. I've always enjoyed reading a Sunday paper. When I lived in St. Louis, I read the St. Louis Post Dispatch and it's even more liberal than the AJC!
Wading through the bullshit, I came upon this item.
Damascus, Syria --- President Bashar Assad said Saturday that Syrian troops in Lebanon would pull back to near the two countries' border, falling short of the complete and immediate withdrawal demanded by the United States and other nations.
Just damn! What will make the Syrians withdraw completely?
The U.S. State Department quickly criticized the announcement as ''not enough,'' adding that ''when the United States and France say withdraw, we mean complete withdrawal --- no halfhearted measures.''
WTF! France? The United States and France? Holy crap! Assad must be shaking in his sandals.
The French Foreign Ministry said in a statement that it expected Assad ''to fully withdraw his troops and services from Lebanon as soon as possible.''
Or by golly we'll sic America on you because the only time France wins a war is when someone else does the fighting.
In his weekly radio address Saturday, released before Assad spoke, Bush said, ''Syria has been an occupying force in Lebanon for nearly three decades, and Syria's support for terrorism remains a key obstacle to peace in the broader Middle East.'' Bush made clear that he was demanding a full Syrian withdrawal before planned Lebanese elections in May.
They probably don't give a shit about the warning from France. Who would? WTF is France gonna do? Send their aircract carrier, the Charles De Gaul. BWAHAHAHAHA! We have a name for an aircraft carrier like that that doesn't leave port. We call it an airfield or an airport.
Here's what could scare the crap out of Syria.
Thanks to Jon for the image.
I have received e-mails about people not being able to commment on my site. Here's what is happening per Jesse, and my own perusing of the logs. When commenting, you are forced to preview your comment. If after previewing, you make any changes, you need to preview again. If you don't, the comment will fail. Yes, this may be a problem for some, but in the last two days, this new code has picked off over 40 pieces of comment spam.
I had MT Blacklist installed a while back to take care of this problem, but it still required intervention from me. I could use MT Blacklist to add a comment to my blacklist and then zap all identical comments. Unfortunately, each comment got sent to my inbox and I would have to delete all those entries. It was a pain in the ass.
You would think that since I was a systems programmer, I could handle all of this stuff on my own. Alas, I have found as I have gotten older it is harder for me to learn stuff. I taught myself MVS and VM. I taught myself mainframe networking stuff: SNA, VTAM, and NCP.
I taught myself TCP/IP and HTML. I learned SYSPLEX and HCD on my own and learned them well enough to write and teach courses on them.
When I first moved to MT, Rachel Lucas was nice enough to set up my site for me. I had read the MT install instructions and they read just like IBM instructions on a new product. Virtually incomprehensible. I made money for IBM Education by writing courses on IBM products with shitty documentation. Bad documentation = education opportunity. For any of you mainframe programmers who took the HCD course from IBM, I was the person who wrote it. I was also the person who taught it for the first four years it was offered.
I had someone else upgrade my MT to accomodate MT Blacklist. And I had Jesse do the latest upgrade for me. I really feel like a techno-boob about now. Ah how the mighty have fallen! From a techno-primadonna to someone afraid to tackle a major site upgrade. Arggghhh!
So I apologize for any inconvenience the upgrade has caused but it sure has saved time for me.
My blog. My time. My rules.
From Airboss.
A Mafia Godfather finds out that his bookkeeper has embezzled ten million bucks. This bookkeeper is deaf. It was considered an occupational benefit, and why he got the job in the first place, since it was assumed that a deaf bookkeeper would not be able to hear anything he'd ever have to testify about in court.
When the Godfather goes to shakedown the bookkeeper about his missing $10 million bucks, he brings along his attorney, who knows sign language.
The Godfather asks the bookkeeper: "Where is the 10 million bucks you embezzled from me?"
The attorney, using sign language, asks the bookkeeper where the 10 million dollar is hidden.
The bookkeeper signs back: "I don't know what you are talking about."
The attorney tells the Godfather: "He says he doesn't know what you're talking about."
That's when the Godfather pulls out a 9 mm pistol, puts it to the bookkeeper's temple, cocks it, and says: "Ask him again!"
The attorney signs to the underling: "He'll kill you for sure if you don't tell him!"
The bookkeeper signs back: "OK! You win! The money is in a brown briefcase, buried behind the shed in my cousin Enzo's backyard in Queens!"
The Godfather asks the attorney: "Well, what'd he say?"
The attorney replies: "He says you don't have the guts to pull the trigger.
I'm posting today's Saturday Boobage for Kim du Toit. What a combination: Boobage and guns! Thanks to Catfish.
The Oscars. Ho. Hum. Who cares? I don't give a fark about Hollywood's love affair with itself. Was the film that won best movie about assisted suicide? So let's see, liberal Hollywood believes in assisted suicide. Liberal Hollywood believes in abortion. Liberal Hollywood believes in partial birth abortion infanticide. So they want to kill cripples, fetuses and babies, but they don't want to kill convicted murderers. Yep. Makes perfect sense to me.
Michael Jackson. Another big yawn. Can you imagine how much fun this pervert is gonna have in prison if he gets convicted? Convicts hate pedophiles.
Martha Stewart. Again. Who cares.
Fosset flying around the world. Now that was neat!
The Supreme Court Decision on not executing murderers under 18. Bullshit! This is why we need three "right wing judges" and by that, I mean judges who will enforce the Constitution and not rely on societal norms and international opinion. What a crock!
The continuing implosion of the Dimocrat Party. Here's a little thought experiment: Imagine if a Republican had equated the Dimocrats in the Senate with Hitler and the Nazis. Imagine the outrage by the lamestream media. Anyway, on Senator Robert "Kleagle" Byrd, I declare Godwin's Law. He's still a bigot.
And finally, a great big thanks to Jesse Brown who just automated my site to eliminate comment spam.
I still feel like crap. I turned down going to a Mexican restaurant with my friend Cindy tonight, so she knows I'm sick. I do feel better than yesterday and I'm hoping to be OK by Monday. And, yes, I will post Saturday Boobage this week.
I got this e-mail this morning.
Good morning. I cover the media as a beat for the Journal-Constitution. I'm looking for a politically oriented blogger in the Atlanta area who does a lot of reporting in addition to commentary. Would you fit that description? If not, can you point me to anyone who does?
Obviously this guy doesn't read my blog and all the nice things I have to say about the Atlanta Urinal and Constipation.. Report? Me? Hell, I'm just a crippled blogger in sweats. I did report on snow conditions at Breckenridge in January and I did report on dive conditions at Cayman Brac (and the perils of getting there and returning), but I don't think that's the type of reporting he has in mind. So there goes my big shot at being legitimate.
Anyway, my writing has sucked since I got back from Cayman Brac. I have an excuse. The evil hacking cough has returned. It's not as bad as when I left, but it still sucks. On top of that I think I have a touch of the flu.
I was awakened this morning by an intense throbbing of the achilles tendon in my left leg. This usually occurs when I have a fever. I have no sensation there so applying Ben Gay or the like doesn't work. Percocet does.
Two years ago when I had my hand surgery, I was given percocet after the operation for pain. I had no pain, but took the percocet anyway. Cindy made me stop because I was real wacky and didn't make much sense. Yeah. Yeah. I mean worse than normal.
I have some percocet left over. I used it. It worked.
Also, since I have been sick, I haven't been able to do my workouts at the gym. As such, my back spasms are acting up again. I got two drugs for that. I've taken them. They're working.
So, if my posts are short and suck the next few days you will know why.
Time to take more drugs and go to bed.
Now that's just wrong. Sent to me by Catfish.
Pumpman took me to task about fisking a frog last night by saying it was like shooting fish in a barrel and I could do better than that. He's right. I can, it's just that I didn't really have anything to write about last night and I took the easy way out. I do that with Molly Ivins columns. I even fisked Ted Rall once. It was an incredibly long post because every single sentence was grade A bullshit.
Speaking of grade A bullshit, I got an offer in the mail to receive a free copy of The American Prospect. which bills itself as "America's liberal conscience". BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Since when do liberals have consciences? Does Ted feel bad about Mary Jo? Ummm. Maybe he does. After all it kept him from being president. Do liberals feel bad about destroying the public school system? Howza 'bout creating a permanent parasitic underclass that relies on gummint support?
Anyway, back to the ad. It starts out:
Dear FriendHere's what the conservatives running Washington want to do NOW:
** Put three new right-wing justices on the Supreme Court who will almost certainly overturn Roe v Wade
This, of course, is the number one scare tactic liberals use to frighten women. It ain't gonna happen.
** Privatize social security, cutting benefits and destroying the most successful social program in our history
More bullshit. The plans being floated right now say nothing about cutting benefits, but, if nothing is done, as the liberals want, there will either need to be benefit cuts, tax increases, or both.
** Make the tax cuts permanent, which will starve the government for generations to come, and shift the tax load onto working families.
I kinda like the idea of starving the gummint. Of course what these dildos fail to point out is that the rich are paying an even higher percentage of the tax load after the "tax cuts for the rich".
Of course there's more bullshit, but I like this paragraph.
We're introducing THE AMERICAN PROSPECT by giving it away to a select group of new readers. Everyday leaders and people who we think will get it, like it, and tell all their friends about it. I think that's you.
And I think that you guys have been smoking way too much crack.
If you care more about ideas than images
Then you sure as hell ain't a liberal. Liberalism is all about images and feelings.
if you believe more in principles than poll results
You sure ain't a liberal. Clinton and the Yabbuts lived by polls. So did Kerry. And what is the problem with the Yabbuts today? They have no ideas. They certainly have no principles or are afraid to run on them. Kerry was for the war before he was against it. Dean is trying to say that the Yabbuts are not pro-abortion but for a woman's right to choose to have an abortion. Sorry Howie. That means you are pro-abortion. Whassa matter? 'Fraid to run on what you believe in? If you do you lose, so you have to try to fool the American people.
if you'd rather contribute to our society rather than complain about it
All the Yabbuts have done is complain and obstruct. Once again, doesn't sound like liberals.
you're gonna love THE AMERICAN PROSPECT
I don't think I really need another humor magazine. I already read The New Republic.
Here's a real good line.
These next four years, a magazine edited by and for tough, smart liberals is more necessary than ever.
Somehow tough, smart, and liberal don't seem to go together.
Here's an endorsement:
" The American Prospect is a fresh voice of committed, thoughtful, and practical liberalism. It brings powerful new ammunition for progressive politics on the current battlefield of ideas." - U.S. Senator Edward M. Kennedy
Now that just makes me want to fill in the card and have 'em send me my free copy. If it's good enough for The Swimmer, it's good enough for me.
