I hope you didn't think I would cheat you out of Saturday Boobage. In honor of Memorial Day, here's some gun boobage.
Looking at the ol' Sitemeter, it looks like I'll hit 2,000,000 hits on Monday or Tuesday. Too bad I won't be here to see it. Thanks to all my readers, even the trolls, who have helped me achieve this milestone.
Actually I passed the 2 million mark a few weeks back if you count the 25,000 hits I got on my old Blowspot site, but this makes it official.
Have a great Memorial Day Weekend!
Dive bag packed? Check.
Duffel packed? Check.
Backpack packed? Check.
Tickets and passport together? Check.
Looks like I'm pretty much ready to go. Where am I going? Down to Little Cayman to spend a week scuba diving. Bloody Bay Wall here I come!
My flight leaves at 10:17 so I don't have to get up in the middle of the night to get to the airport. I figger if I can catch MARTA before 7:00, I should be OK. Fortunately, I can cut the security lines since I'm a cripple. My sister loves to travel with me for that reason.
I'll be gone until next Saturday.
This goes along with my post on ethanol.
Got it from Kerrcarto who stole it from here.
Let's see. We're gonna achieve energy independence by using ethanol. After all, we grow lots of corn don't we? Maybe we should think this through. Making ethanol out of corn might not be such a good idea. It is a gummint solution after all, and sometimes they cause even more problems than they solve. Think War on Poverty. War on Drugs. And one for the moonbats, War on Terror.(Thanks to my brother-in-law for the link.)
It was a scant two years ago that Georgia's Saxby Chambliss voted with 73 other giddy senators for an energy bill that required the nation to use 7.5 billion gallons of ethanol. Georgia's farmers loved corn-based ethanol; Georgia's agri-businesses loved corn-based ethanol; and all that meant that then-Agriculture Committee Chairman Chambliss loved corn-based ethanol, too.
We're saved! We're gonna achieve energy independence. Poof! PFM. But wait!
Earlier this year, Mr. Chambliss introduced a bill calling for even greater ethanol use, though with one striking difference: The bill caps the amount of that fuel that can come from corn. Turns out Georgia's chicken farmers hate corn-based ethanol; Georgia's pork producers hate corn-based ethanol; Georgia's dairy industry hates corn-based ethanol; Georgia's food producers hate corn-based ethanol; Georgia's hunters hate corn-based ethanol. And all that means Mr. Chambliss has had to find a new biofuels religion.
Uh oh. The bloom is off the rose.
The shine is off corn ethanol, and oh, what a comedown it has been. It was only in January that President Bush was calling for a yet a bijillion more gallons of the wonder-stuff in his State of the Union address, and Iowa's Chuck Grassley was practically doing the Macarena in his seat. And why shouldn't Mr. Grassley and fellow ethanol handmaidens have boogied? They'd forced their first mandate through Congress, corn farmers were rolling in dough, billions in taxpayer dollars were spurring dozens of new ethanol plants--and here was the commander-in-chief calling for yet more yellow dollars. All in the name of national security, too!
I know! Let's party hardy with some good ol' corn likker! What? There's not enough corn left over?
Corn ethanol seemed unstoppable, but a remarkable thing happened on the road from Des Moines. Just as the smart people warned, the government's decision to play energy market God and forcibly divert huge amounts of corn stocks into ethanol has played havoc with key sectors of the economy. Corn prices have nearly doubled, which means livestock owners can't afford to feed their animals, and food and drink manufacturers are struggling to buy corn and corn syrup. Environmentalists are sour over new stresses on farmland; international aid groups are moaning that the U.S. is cutting back its charitable food giving, and many of these folks are taking out their anger on Congress.
While the rest of us are taking out our anger on Congress because of the Amnesty Immigration Bill.
Things are even hotter in Washington, where lobbying groups are firming up their positions against corn ethanol. The hugely influential National Cattlemen's Beef Association has gone so far as to outline a series of public demands, including an end to any government tax credits (subsidies) for ethanol and an axe to the import tariff on foreign ethanol. Put another way, the cattlemen are so angry that they are demanding free markets and free trade--a first. Maybe ethanol really is a miracle fuel. In any event, expect the ethanol call to get harder for Plains state senators such as Max Baucus, Ben Nelson and Byron Dorgan.
Free trade? Horrors!
John Stossel wrote a column discussing the myths of ethanol
Some of them:
without subsidies, ethanol would cost much more than gasoline.The claim that using ethanol will save energy is another myth. Studies show that the amount of energy ethanol produces and the amount needed to make it are roughly the same. "It takes a lot of fossil fuels to make the fertilizer, to run the tractor, to build the silo, to get that corn to a processing plant, to run the processing plant," Taylor says.
And because ethanol degrades, it can't be moved in pipelines the way that gasoline is. So many more big, polluting trucks will be needed to haul it.
A University of Minnesota study shows that even turning all of America's corn into ethanol would meet only 12 percent of our gasoline demand.
Studies indicate that the standard mixture of 90 percent ethanol and 10 percent gasoline pollutes worse than gasoline.
So let me get this straight. Corn prices are rising. Corn is not a good thing to make ethanol out of. It's not good for the environment. It doesn't save any energy. So why are we doing this?
Agribusiness, and of course, all the politicians on both sides of the aisle who are being bribed to create this boondoggle.
Watch Iowa. All the presidential candidates of both parties are in favor of corn based ethanol.
I'm shocked!
For those of you who aren't Texans and think they are nothing but a bunch of uncivilized ruffians...not true. In fact, they even have ladies groups that meet regularly to discuss current events and develop needed home skills.
Here is a photo taken at a recent, "Say NO to Hillary" ladies group meeting in Blanco, TX.
From CharlieB who doesn't even live in Texas.
Photo of Khalid Sheik Mohammed's Sister Recently Captured on Camera
Warning!
This is pretty Ugly!
Be warned!
From CharlieB.
First the good news.
Washington —- The Food and Drug Administration Tuesday approved the first birth control pill that eliminates a woman's monthly period.
Wow! Freaking awesome! How much nicer to deal with women who are not OTR or experiencing PMS! Men of the world, we are saved! A new era is dawning of women not being bitchy due to "female problems". How neat is that?
It is designed for women who find their periods too painful, unpleasant or inconvenient and want to be free of them.
This will be a boon for men with wives or grilfriends who also find it rough to be around "women who find their periods too painful, unpleasant or inconvenient and want to be free of them".
The bad news.
They'll find some other reason to be bitchy.
It now looks like the abomination amnesty for illegals immigration shitbomb bill in the Senate is gonna drag out over the recess. Now is the time for you to write, call, fax, and e-mail the senators from your state, especially those that are up for reelection in 2008. My senator, Saxby Chambliss, is up for reelection in 2008. He and my other senator, Johnny Isakson, got booed at a state Republican convention over the weekend. They said that once we read the bill we wouldn't think it was bad. Bullshit! The more I read about this bill, the less I like it.
We do not want a comprehensive immigration bill. We want a fence.
Build a fence! Erect a fence! Construct a fence! Put up a fence! How many ways do we have to say this until our elected "representatives" finally understand what we are saying?
Once we can control the influx of illegal aliens, then we can decide what to do with the ones we have here. If you have a hole in a boat, bailing the water out will not be effective until you fix the hole.
We were sold this same bill of goods back in 1986. That bill was supposed to include enforcement and amnesty. We got the amnesty. We didn't get the enforcement. Offering the 12 to 20 million illegals currently in this country a path to amnesty will just attract more illegals just like the 1986 "solution" did.
Do our elected representatives think we're stupid? Don't answer that. That was a rhetorical question.
Let them know how you feel. There's nothing a politician hates more than the chance of losing the next election. Here is contact info for every member of the Senate.
For you Georgia folks, here is the homepage for Saxby Chambliss. He has an online poll on important issues and illegal immigration is leading.
Update: From Kerrcarto here is a place to go to send a free fax to your senators. Inundate them with paper! Kill some trees to oppose amnesty!
You may have noticed it has been quite some time since I wrote anything about 24. The reason is I suffered a great trauma a few weeks back. It was The Kiss. Yeah. That one. The Kiss between Ann Coulter and Dick Cheney. Not only was it obscene, it had to be one of the very worst kisses I have ever seen on television. It was right up there with the stilted kiss between Harm and Mac as Jag was winding down. C'mon guys! You're actors fer chrissakes. Try to look like you're enjoying yourselves. Yeah, I realize that neither of you is a winner in the looks department, but you're being paid to make this shit look realistic. That effort was simply pathetic!
Yeah 24 jumped the shark before The Kiss, and I'm still watching it, but this season has been a big disappointment. Hey Milo, we're gonna bring you back as a fulltime employee, after being a mere consultant in the first season, just to get shot. Works for me. Contract negotiations with the 24 producers must be a real bitch. I guess we're never gonna find out what happened in Denver.
I wonder if they're gonna tell Josh who his real father is?
<DarthVadervoice> Josh, I am your father. Join me at CTU. It is your destiny</DarthVadervoice>
I wonder if they're gonna hire some new writers next season so we don't have so many recycled plot lines like we had this year?
So what do we have to look forward to tonight? Jack saves Josh. Jack commits parricide. Jack kills Cheng. It would really be nice if there were some excuse for Jack to torture Cheng before he kills him. Payback is a bitch. Jack recovers the circuit board. Jack prevents a war. Jack is a hero.
The only question I have is what's gonna happen to Ricky Freaking Shroder?
From CharlieB.
Yep! That pretty well sums it up. Did I mention that at one time I was a student pilot? Got about 6 solo hours. Had to quit due to medical problems.
Jimmah Carter, the worst president of the 20th Century, opened his yap again and said that the Bush administration had been the "worst in history" for its impact around the world. Yeah. This from the guy who was responsible for the rise of radical Islam in Iran. Speat to us about foreign policy Jimmah, you addled old fool.
Now, He's backing off.
ATLANTA — Former President Jimmy Carter said Monday his remarks were "careless or misinterpreted" when he said the Bush administration has been the "worst in history" for its impact around the world.
What he meant to say was, "I am a senile old fool."
He added: "I think this administration's foreign policy compared to president Nixon's was much worse," Carter said. But he said he did not mean to call it the worst in history.
Nope! That one is reserved for the Carter administration.
Just go back to Plains and STFU, Jimmah.
Update: Gateway Pundit has a list of Jimmah's foreign policy "successes"
To my darling husband,
Before you return from your trip I just want to let you know about the small accident I had with the pickup truck when I turned into the driveway. Fortunately it's not too bad and I really didn't get hurt, so please don't worry too much about me.
I was coming home from Wal-Mart, and when I turned into the driveway I accidentally pushed down on the accelerator instead of the brake. The garage door is slightly bent but the pick up fortunately came to a halt when it bumped into your car.
I am really sorry, but I know with your kind-hearted personality you will forgive me. You know how much I love you and care for you my sweetheart. I am enclosing a picture for you.
I cannot wait to hold you in my arms again
P.S. Your girlfriend called.
Your loving wife.
XXX
This one's from Richard.
An antelope was asked to go to a dance. She bought a new dress and necklace for the dance. Then she had her horns and hooves done. Since she lived alone, she struggled to dress herself. Running late, she encountered a herd of stampeding buffalo approaching the trail. She thought she was fast enough to get past them. But, unfortunately, she was run over by the buffalo. And this is the origin of...
...the self-dressed stamped antelope.
Today is the annual Sommelier Guild of Atlanta Banquet. It's at Trois. Menu and wines follow.
Piper Heidseick Brut NV
Lobster salad, white
asparagus, sous vide
egg, truffle vinaigrette
2003 Chateau Malartic Lagraviere
2005 Cakedbread Sauvignon Blanc
Suckling pig with
tender vegetables
2005 Beaux Freres Pinot Noir
2001 Talley Rosemary Vnyd Pinot Noir
Lamb tenderloin,
fava beans, tomato
confit, natural jus
1989 Chateau Meyney
1989 Chateau Chasse Spleen
Humbolt Fog & Roquefort
cheese
2003 Segehsio Old Vines Zinfandel
2003 Arnaldo-Capari Collepiano Sagrantino Di Montefalco
Milk confit cake evoo cake,
dulce de leche, pistachio
creme, grapefruit sorbet
2000 Chateau Saint Sauveur Muscat Beaumes De Venise
Coffee
Woo hoo! Rachel Lucas is back!. Look out Algore! Look out Hillary! Look out Fatass Moore! One of the best slammers on the web is back! Gotta update my bookmarks!
I owe a big debt of gratitude to Rachel because she is the one who moved me off Blowspot and set up this site for me.
How's this for a campaign promise. All we get from our politicians are zipperless fucks.
Catfish sent me this new game.
Warning! Highly addictive and NSFW!
I never thought I would hear Rimsky-Korsakov played on the guitar. The video isn't very good and it is only an excerpt, but there is some awesome picking going on. Scherezade.
From Vicki. I've been going back through my mail. Where has Vicki gone?
Just horsing around.
From Coach Moe.
Yeah, I know. No AOTW last week. Let's face it. I've been a little bummed. The first antibiotic didn't do its job and for the first time, lactaid didn't do its job, either. Went back to the doctor and I'm on another antibiotic that appears to be working. So that's why I've been a little derelect in my posting. On the upside, much to the disappointment of one of my rabid fans, it looks like I'm gonna live.
Anyway, who should the AOTW be? Why not John McCain? It's bad enough that he helped create that abomination known as McCain-Feingold, now he has signed on to Ted Kennedy's fuck America immigration bill. There go your presidential aspirations Johnny Boy. Dust in the wind.
But fear not. You may never be president, but you will get the coveted AOTW award. Here it is.
This is for all of you economic illiterates out there.
Revenge for shooting alligators. V-man has been blessed with a turtle. Some real cosmic karma dude.
Darrell asked me to repost the link to the Border Control Game.
Our politicans have stabbed us in the back.
WASHINGTON, May 17 — Senate negotiators from both parties announced Thursday that they had reached agreement on a comprehensive immigration bill that would offer legal status to most of the nation’s 12 million illegal immigrants while also toughening border security.
Yep! Reward the lawbreakers with citizenship. Assholes! And in another 20 years we'll do it again.
If the bill becomes law, it would result in the biggest changes in immigration law and policy in more than 20 years. That would provide President Bush with a political lift and a tangible accomplishment for his second term. It would also be a legislative achievement for the new Democratic leaders in Congress, though they said they would seek changes in the measure.
"A tangible accomplishment"? WTF? Creating 12 million Dimocrat voters? What kind of an accomplishment is that? Way to go Dubya.
At the heart of the bill is a significant political trade-off. Democrats got a legalization program, which they have sought for many years. Republicans got a new “merit-based system of immigration,” intended to make the United States more competitive in a global economy.
GMAFB! It's bullshit! We have been screwed by our "public servants" and we didn't even have to drop our pants and bend over. This is the perfect definition of a zipperless fuck.
But the politics of the deal are precarious. Democrats are already trying to tamp down concerns of Hispanic groups, who fear that the bill would make it more difficult for immigrants to bring relatives from abroad. At the same time, Republican negotiators face blistering criticism from some conservatives, who say the bill would grant a virtual amnesty to people who had broken the law.
That's OK. The Republicans will roll over and then wonder why they can't get reelected when the conservatives stay home. And John McCain, who stood by Ted Kennedy at the press conference, can now kiss his preidential aspirations goodbye. As if McCain-Feingold wasn't bad enough he's now signed on to amnesty. What a dickhead!
What a travesty!
Ya gotta hand it to socialists, they are nothing but persistent. In spite of all the massive failures of socialism in the 20th Century, there are still people who think they can make it work. We see the triumphs of socialism in places like North Korea where some of the population eats grass. And Cuba which has "free" health care. Lemme ask you a question: If you needed surgery, even minor surgery, where would you like to have it, in Cuba or the United States? In spite of what Michael Creosote opines, if you select Cuba, you're an idiot.
What do you think a Cuban or a North Korean would say if they walked into an American super market and saw all the fresh produce? What about the fresh dairy products and the assortment of fresh meat? They would think they had died and gone to heaven.
Back in the late 90's I traveled to Russia and took a boat from Moscow, through the rivers and lakes, to St. Petersburg. The people in the small towns begged for money from the "rich" Americans. Another example of the triumph of socialism.
It's true that people believe that the only reason socialism has never worked everywhere it's been tried is that the right people haven't been in charge or there hasn't been enough money to make it work.
Enter Hugo Chavez, the latest nincompoop who thinks he can be successful at making socialism work and what does he do? He follows the Robert Mugabe system. You know. Seize all the farms and divide them up and give 'em to the illiterate peasants.
The squatters arrive before dawn with machetes and rifles, surround the well-ordered rows of sugar cane and threaten to kill anyone who interferes. Then they light a match to the crops and declare the land their own.
There ya go. Destroy the crops that could be sold. Makes perfect sense to me.
For centuries, much of Venezuela’s rich farmland has been in the hands of a small elite. After coming to power in 1998, and especially after his re-election in December, President Hugo Chávez vowed to end that inequality, and has been keeping his promise in a process that is both brutal and legal.
Sound familiar? That's what happened in Zimbabwe. Remember Zimbabwe? It used to be a wealthy country that exported food. Thanks to Mugabe's socialism and land "reforms" it now has to import food and much of its population is starving. Also inflation is running about 1800%. What irony that Zimbabwe is chairing a UN committee on sustained development. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Mr. Chávez is carrying out what may become the largest forced land redistribution in Venezuela’s history, building utopian farming villages for squatters, lavishing money on new cooperatives and sending army commando units to supervise seized estates in six states.
"Utopian farming villages" and "cooperatives". Hmmmm! Sounds like something the Soviet Union tried. I wonder if Chavez is gonna set up 5 year plans?
The violence has gone both ways in the struggle, with more than 160 peasants killed by hired gunmen in Venezuela, including several here in northwestern Yaracuy State, an epicenter of the land reform project, in recent years. Eight landowners have also been killed here.
Well geez, dontcha know that you gotta break eggs to make an omelet?
Mr. Chávez’s supporters have formed thousands of state-financed cooperatives to wrest farms and cattle ranches from private owners. Landowners say compensation is hard to obtain. Local officials describe the land seizures as paving stones on “the road to socialism.”
Paving stones to disaster would be more like it.
he government says the goal of the nationwide resettlement is to make better use of idle land and to make Venezuela less dependent on food imports. New laws allow squatters to manage and farm land that has now been placed in government hands.
What do you want to bet that food imports are gonna go up rather than down?
Carlos Machado Allison, an agricultural economist at the Institute for Higher Administrative Studies in Caracas, said demand for food had climbed more than 30 percent in the last two years with the oil boom, while Venezuela’s capacity to produce food grew only 5 percent.
And it's gonna get worse. The only thing that allows the gummint to build the houses for the peasants on the cooperatives is the oil money and that will only go so far. Just like in Zimbabwe, they have seized the lands of people who actually know how to farm and given it to illiterate peasants who don't.
Watch over the next five years as Venezuela goes down the crapper.
It will be Bush's fault.
Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi offer terms of surrender to our Jihadi enemies.
Sent to me by CharlieB who obviously stole it from the site at the bottom of the picture.
Psssst! Wanna piss off Algore? Then go buy some Carbon Debits. As it says on the site:
We are on a mission to take away every one of Al Gore's meaningless carbon credits by simply providing carbon debits. Help us make this dream a reality by purchasing one of the packages below. Don't let Al Gore assuage his guilt with meaningless penance, heap it back on with carbon debits – every one of which we will let him know about.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Kill a tree!
From Jeff in Tucson.
"Congress is spending money like John Edwards at a beauty shop."
Former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee.
I might just add that that was a Republican Congress. That's one reason they are no longer in the majority.
Evidently, Michael Fatass challenged Fred Thompson to a debate on Cuba. Here's Fred's response.
Got it from Josh.
Even though I am still messed up from the antibiotics, I forced myself to attend a single malt Scotch tasting. Sorry Elisson it filled up to fast to get you in. And Eric is in Scotland swilling good single malt so I don't have to feel bad about not getting him in. I'm sure he'll be jealous if and when he reads this.
Here's the menu.
Salad (Choice of One):
Caesar Salad
Wedge of Iceberg Lettuce
Entrees (Choice of One):
Ribeye 16oz
New York Strip 12oz
Filet 12oz
Atlantic Salmon 10oz
Seabass 10oz
Served with the 25 and 30 year old Highland Single Malt Scotches)
Sides :
Au Gratin Potatoes, Creamed Spinach, and Asparagus
Desserts (An Assortment of):
McKendrick's Cheesecake
Key Lime Pie
Chocolate Volcano Cake
(Served with Highland Park Single Cask (#691) Single Malt Scotch Whisky distilled in 1983.)
So let's see, we got to taste 12 year old, 15 year old, 18 year old, 25 year old, and 30 year old single malt Scotch. Then we got to taste a single malt Scotch from a single cask distilled in 1983. The best thing of all is this was totally free! Yep! Booze and food totally free! What a deal!
Is it any wonder I forced myself to attend?
Ron sent me another essay. There are some thins in this essay that I agree with and some things that I do not. I figger this may promote a lively debate in the comments.
Here's Ron.
Going through old files while visiting Mother last week, I read some notes and essays generated by my probe into various religions about 15 years ago. My bottom line conclusion at that time was that Christianity was more or less an update of Judaism and Islam was another modification of Christianity. The major differences were that Judaism was locked in the past, resisted change, and still awaited the Messiah’s arrival; Christianity was time-fixed much like Judaism, but willing to incorporate more modern ideas, and was awaiting the second coming of the Messiah; and Islam had no time anchor, was much simpler, and didn’t really know if it wanted a messiah or not.
The laws of Islam and Judaism are quite similar, especially where diet is concerned; in fact, it appears Muhammad very heavily plagiarized the Books of Moses. Essentially the three faiths are first cousins, like the people who gave rise to them, but Christianity first made the older faith more tolerant and loving and then later went through a period of excesses before undergoing a series of reforms which removed the fear and brutality common among zealots. The Crusades were no different from the Islamic jihads, and the Inquisition was to the Taliban as the sacrifice of Isaac was to the crucifixion of Jesus.
For many years I believed that the people of the Middle East were simply victims of their own history and culture. All they needed, it seemed, was an opportunity to develop their own forms of democracy and political freedom without warlords and tyrants and bullies. Summing up all the philosophers I had read over the years – Locke, Rousseau, Kant, Nietzsche – I believed that people were more or less the same no matter where you found them, basically good and kind and loving and all that. They preferred being sociable and gentle and neighborly to conquest and domination and violence. The people weren’t the cause of wars and murders; the fanatics were – the warlords, the tyrants, the bullies – and although new ones always seemed to pop up in every new generation, they were a tiny minority, only occasional warts on the gentle nature of the people themselves.
As we kicked Saddam out of Kuwait and then later deposed and executed him, as the Iraqi people in great numbers voted in free elections, as schools were rebuilt and reopened and girls were finally seen as people instead of property, as the infrastructure approached late 20th century efficiency, I decided that we had done a good thing and the world would profit greatly from our ethical stance and magnanimity. I was confident that our efforts in Iraq and Afghanistan would minimize, or at least delay, terrorist attacks on the homeland by lunatics bent on bending the entire world into Islam and reestablishment of the long-ago and longed-for caliphate.
Well, I was wrong. Not in a flash of insight or dazzling epiphany or sudden comprehension, but over years and months of subconscious analysis and data collection I’ve come to realize that the people of the "birthplace of civilization" are savage, barbarous, worthless bastards. We are wasting our time and money and energies trying to come up with a silk purse from a sow’s ear. The entire Middle East, from Afghanistan to Morocco, from Turkey to Somalia, is a sty, a sick primate breeding pen, a cradle of suspicion and fear and intrigue whose only currency results from the rest of the world’s addiction to liquid fossil fuels.
The concept of majority rule is perverted in that region to the point that minority rights simply do not exist. They fully understand the principle of voting, but once the vote is held, the losers no longer have any rights on the issues which brought about the elections in the first place. Their natural and immediate response to losing is predictably childish: throw a fit, kill people, blow up things, use terror and carnage to intimidate and coerce people and governments to conform to their grotesque doctrine, their diseased comprehension, their deformed philosophy.
They aren’t worth saving. Even the so-called "moderate" Muslims in Iraq are irredeemable. Hundreds of thousands of Iraqis know where the IED factories are, where the foreign troublemakers are living, where the weapons are coming from and where they’re being cached. If they truly wanted the Iranian and Hizb’allah and Syrian and Egyptian troublemakers out of their country, they’d do something about it. But they don’t, so they’re complicit, guilty by association and by indifference to our efforts. Iraq, Pakistan, Afghanistan, Syria, Iran, Egypt, Libya . . . all have lived so long under the regimes of dictators, under the control of thugocracies, under the stifling umbrella of religious fanaticism that personal choice and freedom of just about anything are as remote to them as American football is to Europe and soccer is to us.
What happens to the people of that region, including everything from the Azores to Zimbabwe to Ankara to Zaire to Islamabad to Iraq and everything in between no longer interests me. Should our government decide to capture the oil wealth of the entire region and use it for our own purposes, fine. Should our national strategy include total elimination of all power points in Islamic nations, fine. Should our troops come home en masse next Saturday at 0700, fine. I really no longer care.
Iraq is not a déjà vu Vietnam; it’s a sewer infested with diseased subhumans operating on instructions from hopelessly contaminated DNA. The al Qaeda cancer has metastasized and is inoperable. The Hizb’allah carbuncle has spread its tentacles beyond its original Palestine in situ to open suppurating pustules in Europe and South America. The Saudi Madrassas have poisoned the fountains of knowledge in every Islamic city and nation on the planet such that weeding out the ignorance and hatred will take at least 5 generations.
It’s over. The American people cannot grasp the concept of selecting the battlefield. Our national memory is too short, our nature too forgiving, our focus too easily distracted to understand that the only way to keep war out of the country is to keep it in others. Conservatives will very likely lose more power in the next general election, and unless the GOP can find, groom, and get behind an electable candidate, the next PotUS will be a Democrat. Al Qaeda leadership knows that. Iran knows that. Syria knows that. Once again the US military will be downsized, underfunded, and forced to operate with aging aircraft, ships, and technology while our oil dollars purchase state-of-the-art devices in various groups whose goal is to kill us both as a nation and as individuals. All they have to do is wait.
Whether we continue trying to restructure Iraq to stabilize the region or not, whether our troops come home tonight at suppertime or 3 years from now, whether the surge improves security or fails miserably . . . it all makes no difference. Staying there now is merely postponing the inevitable because unless and until somebody bloodies our nose again, we’re not going to support George Bush’s "illegal" war. Bet on it. I hate to say it, and I know my take on it all won’t be popular with a lot of people, but there it is.
We are engaged in painting over rust, putting new shingles on cardboard roof decking, trying to instruct 2-year-olds in the fine art of negotiation and compromise. Showing people in that region how to establish a viable republican form of government is like trying to explain the exquisite pain of childbirth to a cowboy, or make a teenage girl understand what happens to a guy when he rides his bike over a curb and hits the crossbar with the wrong part of his anatomy. They won’t get it, primarily because they don’t WANT to get it. They actually NEED a strongman, a prince, a king, a dictator. Nothing else will work over there. Hell, it almost didn’t work here.
Our credibility is already shot in Europe and throughout Islam. Staying in Iraq will only further degrade our status world-wide. Our oldest and staunchest allies have abandoned us except for a token few troops here and there which together add up to only 10% or so of the total "coalition" effort. We’ve had troops in Germany and Japan since 1945; will we have to stay in Iraq and Afghanistan for 60 years as well? Let’s get out . . . of EVERYwhere. Bring home ALL the troops. Let Japan worry about NorKor. Let China worry about Islam. Let Europe worry about Europe. Let the socialists have all of Latin America.
Put our troops, what few we’ll have left after the next election, on our southern border. Let them assist after hurricanes and earthquakes and floods and fires. Make the streets safe in LA and Detroit and Atlanta and Miami, not Baghdad. And if anybody has any troubles with their neighbors, if somebody invades somebody else or steals their resources, if socialism and Sharia law don’t solve all the problems, take them to the UN to get them sorted out. Let’s stop playing Globocop and take care of our own back yard for a while. If nobody likes what we have to say, let’s quit talking.
I get to go back to the doctor today for my elbow and I'm a little bummed and don't feel like writing. Here's some Southern humor that Dog sent me.
South Carolina:
The owner of a golf course in South Carolina was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from Clemson and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would you take off?"
The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings."
You gotta love those South Carolina women.
********************************************************
Alabama :
A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck.
"Where's Henry?" the others asked.. " Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied.
"You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired.
"A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"
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Louisiana:
A senior at Louisiana was overheard saying... "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana." When asked why, he replied he'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world.
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Georgia:
The young man from Georgia came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"
Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was? "The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."
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Tennessee:
A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"
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And My Favorite:
A man in North Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait.
A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire."
The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?"
The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back! I never did understand it neither."
To follow up on my I'm A Mongrel post. Got it from Jon.
My latest French troll, Zero, calls Americans a mongrel race. Hmmmm. Who else said something like that back in the middle of the 20th Century? Can't quite recall his name. Nice to know who Zero's role model is.
Let's see. At one time France consisted of Celts and Gauls. Then the Romans came in. Many settled there. Then we had the Franks and Goths. Let's not forget the Normans. So, it's nice to see that the French themselves are not mongrels.
As to myself, sure I'm a mongrel. On my mother's side I'm 100% German. There are names like Breitschuh, Neudeck, Eisele, Gruner, and Weber. My sister, who is into genealogy bigtime, has traced all of my mother's ancestors back to Germany and can tell you what part of Germany they came from. Short of traveling to Germany she's finished unless she can find some online records on the internet.
On my father's side, I'm all English, which is, of course, full of mongrels when you consider that England has had Celts, Angles, Saxons, Danes, Normans, and who knows what else. I Know there is a Norman on my father's side. My sister has found a branch of my family that goes all the way back to Charlemagne. Big deal! 3/4 of Western Europeans are descendants of Charlemagne. Names on my father's side of the family are nice English names like Byrd, Harris, Freeman, Blossom, Boren, and, of course, Wilson.
Sure, we're a nation of mongrels and we're much better for it. Up until the rise of multiculturalism, we were the great melting pot. People from other places came here, learned English and assimilated. One of my German ancestors came here in 1850, settled in Illinois, and after the Civil War started, joined up and fought on the Union side. He assimilated in ten years.
Immigrants kept some things from their previous countries and they were adopted by Americans. That's why we celebrate St. Patrick's Day. Everyone is Irish on that day. Everyone is German during Octoberfest. Hell, we Anglos even celebrate Cinqo De Mayo. Why not celebrate a day when Mexicans defeated a French army?
What's really funnny is how such an inferior mongrel race, like we Americans, was somehow able to create the richest and most powerful nation the world has ever seen. We mongrels put a man on the moon. We mongrels have the power to wipe out everyone on this planet. We mongrels live in the country that has the largest economy in the world.
I'm proud to me a mongrel!
This one came from DBolsman.
Several nuns were in their second floor convent one night when a fire broke out. The nuns took their habits off and tied them together to make a rope to get out of the building via the window.
After they were safely on the ground and out of the building, a news reporter came over to one of the nuns and said to her, "Weren't you afraid that the habits could have ripped or broken since they are old?"
The nun replied, "No, don't you know...
...old habits are hard to break!??!"
John Williams playing my favorite Spanish guitar piece.
A guickie from Barney.
Two blondes are walking down the road when one says, “Look at that dog with one eye!”
The other blonde covers one of her eyes and says, “Where?”
Jeff sent me some redhead boobage.
Budman8 sent me this video. NSFW!
Who cares? What is our obsession with these train wrecks? My buddy Jim says it best. Make sure you read all the way to the bottom where he has penned the best one liner I have ever read about bimbo Paris. He said this one to me in Kerrville.
I wrote a draft of the rest of the Blown-Eye Blodge meetup but forgot to publish it. Scroll down or go here.
I got home from Texas Monday night and my friend Cindy called me.
Cindy: What's up with your elbow?
Me: It's swollen. I guesss you read that on my blog.
Cindy: Yeah. When I went to feed the cats, I noticed your truck was gone and wondered why you would take that. Then, I noticed you'd left behind your crutches and I knew something must be wrong. I checked your blog and found out your elbow was hurting.
Then she asked me all sorts of questions about it, which I found out the next day that I'd answered wrong. I was also in trouble for not going to the doctor before I went to Texas. Miss a Blown-Eyed Blodger meet? Not if I can help it! I told her that I was going to the doctor on Tuesday. She was off work that day and offered to take me. Since she's an RN, she always knows what the doctor is saying.
On Tuesday, when she came over and saw my elbow she told me I had answered all her questions wrong. She wasn't as pissed as she usually is when I delay taking care of a medical problem. Sometimes she chews me out like I was her husband. That's when I know I've really messed up.
We got to the doctor's office and the nurse took my vitals. My blood pressure was the lowest it's been in years. 130/70. I am on BP meds. Nice to see they're working.
One of the guys who works in the pharmacy came by and said, "How you doing today, Mr. Wilson?" See. I take so many drugs that the pharmacy guys know me by name.
I had an open sore on my elbow that was draining so he took a sample to culture it. He thought it might be MRSA which is a virulent staph infection resistant to many antibiotics. He put me on an antibiotic that is supposed to be effective against it. It's one of those hardcore antibiotics that kills everything, even the beneficial bacteria that reside in the intestines. I'm taking lots of lactaid to prevent the runs. Doctors never tell you to do that. Cindy alerted me to that trick and it works.
I got my test results back and forwarded them to Cindy so she can tell me what they mean. It's really cool. My HMO sends me an e-mail as soon as my test results are back. I can then log on and see them. They notify my doctor at the same time, so I might have seen them before he has.
Now I wait.
Here's his wife, Minnie.
Got it from Jason.
This is just so wrong.
Got it from Bill.
This reminds me of a really bad joke.
This guy was walking through a forest when he saw a guy with his arms around a tree. He asked him what he was doing and the guy told him he was listening to the tree talk. Did he want to try?
So the guy puts his arms around the tree and the other guy whips out a pair of handcuffs, handcuffs him to the tree, takes his wallet, and splits.
About an hour later another guy comes up, sees him and asks him what happened.
The first guy tells him his story and bemoans his fate.
The other guy unzips his pants and says, "This has not been your lucky day!"
Have you seen clips of the TV show put on by Hamas that uses a Mickey Mouse character? Now Hamas is dropping it.
A program using a Mickey Mouse-like character to urge Palestinian children to fight Israel and the West and work for world Islamic domination has been pulled off Hamas's television station for "review," Palestinian Information Minister Mustafa Barghouti said Wednesday.Barghouti said the use of the cartoon character in such a role represented a "mistaken approach" to the Palestinian struggle against Israeli occupation.
Nah! The real reason they dropped it was they were terrified of an angry army of Disney lawyers.
I gotta learn this song!
Sent to me by many readers.
I just received the following e-mail from an adoring fan named Ian McGuinness who lives in the UK.
I hope its cancer in your elbow you fucking moron - please go and die of aids cuntSuch compassion! Sorry dude! It's not cancer. The doctor thinks it's MRSA and I'm on antibiotics for it.
So we had this great dinner that couldn't be beat: brisket, potato salad, beans, and cornbread muffins. Maybe more, but I'd had a few Shiners by then. GuyK brought some homemade gumbo.
Shoe took me by her house to meet her mom who's been reading me for a long time and wanted to meet me. The kids came out and said hello. I told Shoe's mom about how much fun we had in Nawlins and some neat stories about her daughter, much to Shoe's dismay.
On our way back to the hotel, Shoe stopped to pick up some cigarette lighters for the people who had flown in and had them confiscated by the TSA. My question is, why didn't they pack some lighters in their luggage?
She stopped at a convenience store and came out with a handful of lighters.
Shoe: You see that guy behind the counter?
Me: Yes.
Shoe: Dude. I think he has the hots for me. (He was probably looking at her boobage.)
Me: Why is that?
Shoe: I asked him to give me the best deal he could on some cigarette lighters and he picked up a handful and gave them to me. Free!
Later she told me that she looked at them and they said "Free with a purchase of a carton..." She was a little pissed because they weren't free after all and maybe the guy didn't have the hots for her. I pointed out that since she didn't purchase a carton of whatever, they were still free. She gave most of them to Erica who managed to lose most of them. It's times like these that I am glad I quit smoking over 30 years ago. How do you guys afford to smoke?
This was a real laid back group. Without Yabu and V-man around we didn't have to worry about being kicked out of the hotel.
Kerrcarto showed up and we just sat around enjoying the night and the company. I made it until 12:30 and then I had to go to bed. I had already driven over 400 miles that day.
Becky showed up in the morning and as the name of her blog states, she is one tall cool drink of water. Also a babe! Jim showed up with his arsenal of weapons. I haven't seen Jim since a Kim du Toit birthday party many moons ago. It was nice seeing him again.
We started back up around noon. Shoe and I made a lunch run. All the Blown-Eyes chipped in and we wound up with $117 to pay for $38 worth of food at the el cheapo Mexican place. Blown-Eyes are generous. Leslie alone kicked in $40. Everyone got a nice refund.
Then it was time for the Elderly Brothers, Jimbo and I, to perform. For all of you folks bitching about no Saturday Bach (Charlie Delta) I played some at Kerrville. See. You come to a Blown-Eyed Blodger meet you get Saturday Bach. I had to do my version of Pretty Fucked up twice. Fortunately, there weren't any kids around so I could sing the uncensored version.
It was GuyK's birthday. You can see the cake and some of his presents we got him here. Erica did a lot of work on that including ordering the cake. We should have sent Shoe along to get the cake. She might have gotten it free.
Soon it was time for dinner and since we were too lazy to go out, Shoe sugggested pizza. The pizza place she uses screwed up an order a while back and gave her a coupon for two free extra large pizzas to rectify the matter. She figgered we could get four pizzas and two of them would be free. Guess what? They screwed up again and couldn't figger out how to make two of the pizzas free so they wound up giving us all four pizzas free. I'm thinking Shoe's boobage might have been involved in this.
Around 10:00 they kicked us out of the pool area and we migrated to another area. I bailed around midnight since I had to drive home the next day.
Jim asked me to knock on his door before I left and Shoe had me call her at home so she could come and say goodbye. While I was waiting, Jim and I chewed the fat. It really sucks that the Blown-Eyes live so far away from each other and we can only meet up twice a year. More would be better. We need a midway point between Georgia and Texas. Two years ago we did Nawlins. Jim suggested Mobile.
Shoe gave me a big hug and sent me on my way. She looked hot in a skirt (First time I've ever seen her in one.) and a black top.
My GPS routed me through the Hill Country and I picked up I-35 north of Austin. It was a pretty drive. I made it to Monroe Louisiana and spent the night there.
The next day, cruising on I-20 just east of Birmingham I experienced some highway karma. I came upon a huge traffic tieup. Nothing was moving at all. Fortunately, I was at an exit. I jumped off of I-20 and stopped my Garmin so the lady wouldn't bitch at me and found Highway 78 heading west. After driving two miles, I reset the Garmin and it found the next entrance to I-20. There was no one on I-20. It must have been a bodacious accident to have shut down all of the eastbound lanes.
Made it the rest of the way without incident with the exception of Atlanta traffic on I-285.
I had a great time as I always do when I meet up with a bunch of Blown-Eyes.
From Lisa Kay.
Update: The original came from here. Thanks Matt, for alerting me to this.
Last Thursday I took off for Kerrville Texas for what I hope is gonna be an annual blodgemeet. Last year we did San Antonio, this year we did Kerrville. I almost didn't make it. My left elbow started bothering me Monday night. I thought it might have had sumpin' to do with my workout, but I used the same weights I normally use and I didn't push myself any harder that I normally do.
Because my left elbow was messed up and I was unable to walk, I took my pickup truck. It's easier to get the chair in and out of that than it is my BMW 325.
I made pretty good time on the first day. I should have stopped at Beau Bridge Louisiana, since I had stayed there before, but since Kerrville is further away than New Braunfels, I drove past it and stopped in Lafayette Louisiana. Big mistake.
There was some sort of convention going on for middle school or high school girls and the motels were packed. I sat, in my wheelchair, in an 8x12 lobby for 15 minutes watching the incompetent bitch behind the desk try to get everyone checked in. Finally, she finished and took care of the person who had been waiting longer than I had. Then she addressed me.
Incompetent Bitch: Can I help you?
Me: I need a room.
IB: A handicapped room? (Duh!)
Me: I would prefer one, but if you have one that I can get my wheelchair in and out of, I could make that work.
IB: We don't have any.
Me: It would have been nice if you had told me that rather than making me wait her for 15 minutes.
IB: I didn't see you.
WTF? It's an 8x12 lobby. How could she not see me? About this time, I wanted to put some chlorine in the gene poll with a few well placed bullets between her eyes.
I got back into the truck and the next place had a room. It was a dump. By this time I didn't care.
The next morning I was off. Once again, I made great time. If only my truck had cruise control. And more comfortable seating. On the upside, my elbow was better.
Shoe called me along the way and told me to call her when I got on 27 at Comfort which I did. As I was pulling into the Inn of the Hills in Kerrville, another vehicle pulled in nearby and a dude got out and asked me if I was coming or going. I figgered this must be commenter Kerrcarto and I was right. We talked for awhile and he said he would come back over that evening. We blodgers don't care if you're a blodger or not. Show up and you can party with us.
After I got checked in, I headed for the bar since I knw that was where the Blown-Eyes would be. That would be Jimbo, Leslie, Erica (Who came all the way from Brooklyn and is now officially a Blown-Eye. Hey Drooling Cumspot! Erica has a picture of the two of us together on her blog.), Walrilla (whom I met last year and never put it on the People I've Met blogroll.), and GuyK whom I hadn't seen since the Low Country Boil at Catfish's last year. Leslie was nice enough to go to the bar and get me a Shiner. If it's a blodgemeet,I'm drinking Shiner.
We decided to migrate out to the pool so Shoe could find us when she brought the dinner she, her mother, and grandmother made for the Blown-Eyes. Immediately we started breaking rules. I wasn't allowed to take alcohol oout of the bar. Hide the Shiner and roll on out to the pool. No glass bottles. Yeah. Right. Shoe did clear the food with the hotel.
At the pool, we were joined by Jerry, El Capitan, Indiana Jerry, Nancy (who was there last year and didn't make my People I've Met blogroll. I got me some site work to do.), her hubby, Hammer, and this guy who decided to start a blog after hanging out with us.
That's all for today. Went to the doctor. Taking drugs for my elbow. More later.
Tomorrow: Shoe scores free stuff.
Some people are upset at the election results in France. Leftists just love to act like spoiled children when they don't get their way.
This is a chance for Prosper and Diplomate to give us their takes on the election. I imagine Zero will do some foaming at the mouth bullshit as well.
Didn't post a Monday Pun this week, so here's a late pun that Mo K sent me.
What do you call a protestant church leader who uses speed?
A Crystal Methodist.
This one is for the older half of the Elderly Brohters, Jimbo.
Got ot from Darrell.
Many readers sent me this.
Maybe this is what Imus was talking about. Speaking of Imus, I hear he's upped his lawsuit to $120 million. I hope he wins!
I'm back from Texas. Got in around 6:30. I'm not writing anything tonight. Gotta unpack, check comments, and read e-mail. I had a blast! I met some new people. And got to see some old friends. I'll be back to blogging tomorrow. I get to go see the doctor about my left elbow.
I'm leaving tomorrow morning to head off to Kerrville Texas for Blodger de Mayo. Since I messed up my left elbow lifting weights on Monday, I'll be taking my wheelchair and driving my truck.
Just in case you get bored and need sumpin' to do, I've got a new French troll named Zorro. He's posting in the comments on this post. Poor guy. He's jealous that France has become like an old washed up harlot that no one cares about anymore. Feel free to have a little sport with him. This can be your chance to play with an Asshole of the Week.
I'll be back Monday night. Sorry, no boobage this week. No Monday Pun either.
Yep! Someone is on top of this. Go here.
Thanks to Juan.
Everyone knows that fire cannot melt steel, so it's only a matter of time until the nutroots come up with a 429Truth.org website. The Farkers have been busy.
Before you liberals go unhinged, there is not a Truth429.org website yet. We are making fun of you and your tinfoil hat theories.
I just finished reading a book called Every Man A Tiger. It was written by Tom Clancy and retired General Chuck Horner. It was about the air war during the first Gulf War. Horner was the guy who ran the air war.
The first part of the book gives some background on Horner. He was a fighter pilot in the Viet Nam War. Like most of the fighter pilots he was pissed about how the war was run. Y'see, we were trying to be the good guys and practice gradual escalation to try to convince North Viet Nam to butt out. As such, the pilots weren't allowed to take out the North Vietnamese airbases. They also weren't allowed to take out the first SAM sites. Needless to say, this pissed our guys off since this kept us from having air superiority and caused more planes to be shot down than should have been. Horner vowed this would never happen if and when he ran an air war. It didn't. If you remember in the first Gulf War, we took out the airbases, SAM sites, and shot down all the Iraqi fighters that tried to fight us. Many of them escaped to Iran, who still has those planes. We owned the sky over Iraq.
During Viet Nam, Horner also stated that if a fighter pilot happened to have a target near an airbase, they occasionally "missed" their target and "accidentally" bombed a runway or two.
Near the end of the war, when we were pulling out, Horner had a conversation with a South Vietnamese fighter pilot. We had promised South Viet Nam two squadrons of F4's. He asked Horner, "We're not getting those F4's are we?" The Dimocrats had cut funding. This was an act of betrayal by the United States. Horner remembered this.
He also remembered the humanitarian disaster that resulted by our betrayal of South Viet Nam. The North violated the peace treaty. Shortly thereafter, Saigon fell. Then we had the boat people. The reeducation camps. Millions of people disappeared. The Killing Fields in Cambodia. Much of that resulted from the betrayal of the United States.
Fast forward to Gulf War I. After we had thrown Saddam out of Kuwait, we encouraged the Shi'ites in the south to revolt. Unfortunately, we didn't offer them any support and Saddam crushed them. Another betrayal by the United States. I blame Bush pere for this. See, I can lambast Republicans. Unfortunately, he wasn't much of a Republican. "Read my lips! No new taxes." He then cut a deal with Congress for tax increases if they would cut spending. Just as during the Reagan adminisration, when the Dims said they were gonna cut spending, they always reneged on the deal.
But I digress.
Horner remembered Viet Nam and the American betrayal. Here is what he wrote on page 99, right after he explained how sometimes they bombed an airfield in North Viet Nam.
What good did any of that do? I learned something. I learned that you could not trust America. And I tell my Arab friends that as I point out to them that the once-upon-a time capital of the last nation to put complete faith in American military might is now called Ho Chi Minh City.
And now we see it again. We have freed Iraq. Their new gummint has put faith in us, but we are gonna cut and run. We'll see another act of betrayal and just like the Dimocrats did when we betrayed South Viet Nam, they'll rejoice when we betry Iraq. The humanitarian disaster that will strike when we leave will no more bother them than the humanitarian disaster that struck when we left South Viet Nam.
This is why I hate Dimocrats. They are the party of betrayal.
Why not? She's working on the accent. If Bill can be the first black president, she can be the first female black president.
Got it from Woody.
